


anajwo

by heolaman



Category: EXO
Genre: College!AU, Comedy, Fluff, M/M, Mpreg, Romance, midnight sun!inspired
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2018-07-09
Updated: 2018-10-30
Packaged: 2019-06-07 17:07:17
Rating: Mature
Warnings: Major Character Death
Chapters: 3
Words: 23,366
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/15223811
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/heolaman/pseuds/heolaman
Summary: Chanyeol will always remember that fateful night when he first met the reason why he learned how to live a life again.





	1. the musician and his scarf

**Author's Note:**

> this is really fluffy and cute please read lol! this is for my friends, Dwi and Tiara who never gave up on this story. I love you guys. spoiler alert, Baek dies. 
> 
>  
> 
> i dont have any beta so expect grammar errors.

It was a teeth clattering nights wherein Chanyeol busks the busy streets of Seoul, hoping to give a bit of relaxation by his self-composed music in exchange of coins being dropped on his guitar case. He’s lucky to receive paper bills but that doesn’t happen most of the time. 

A university student like him who ran away from home because he chose to do what his heart wanted needs to work extra and that’s the only job he can do – aside from part timing at a convenience store near his tenement. 

 

Life is hard especially when you’re on your own but then he enjoyed singing his heart out, smiling as he utter the feelings he couldn’t say, strumming his guitar and getting appreciated by strangers. It’s like the most ideal work for him. 

Chanyeol learned to settle with the appreciation he’s been receiving and the life he’s been living.

 

However, the night is too damn cold unlike the usual and he was unfortunately clothed thinly. Clothing was cut off in his budget for the month and his usual jacket was at his laundry basket. His every breath is vivid and his thick fingers started to freeze. It made difficult for him to play vibrant songs so he settled playing mellow love songs. Though his voice cracks because of the weather, he managed to receive praises and a good amount of thousand wons. 

That achievement deserve a bowl of noodles in the ramen place few walks from where he stays. 

When Chanyeol finished his last song and it’s time to pack up, he heard childish clapping on his side – of amusement? Chanyeol doesn’t know but he took it positively. It was from a small boy with raven hair wearing cute earmuffs, mittens and scarf matching altogether. Unlike him, the boy is clothed thickly and looked warm. 

Chanyeol eyes rake down at the boy further and noticed the boy’s estimated height could only reach his chest. He wondered why would a high school student like him is lurking around late. Kids like him should be at home sleeping. _Doesn’t he have a curfew or something?_

“You’re so good!” the boy told Chanyeol who was beaming an eye smile at the red haired university student. Yes. University grants freedom to whatever you do to your appearance and Chanyeol chose to be red and distracting. “Your voice! I like it! You can be a singer – well you are already a singer but like, the popular ones? The one you see on TV! You are better than them!”

 

The musician grins. _He’s mumbling too fast._

 

“If you like it then, give me donations.” Chanyeol kids, standing up as he finishes packing. He slings his guitar on his shoulder and noticed that what he thought about their height difference earlier is right. The boy nervously played with his fingers, biting his lips warily, taking his joke as a serious thing. “I’m kidding.”

“Oh.” The kid blinks, then he smiled again and this time, Chanyeol thinks it’s so cute when the boy looks up to him. “Sorry. I don’t have money right now but here.”

The boy took off the scarf wrapped around his neck and took steps closer so he can stand near Chanyeol. An inch or two apart? Who knows but it was extremely close. With wide eyes, Chanyeol watched the boy tiptoe his way so he can put the scarf around him securely, making him warm. The boy’s minty orange-ish breath lingered in the taller’s nose. “What are you doing?”

“Keeping you warm. It’s really cold, you know.”

Chanyeol didn’t know what got him when he held the boy’s soft hands against his. The stranger is weirding him out. He slowly let go of the boy’s hand because it can be considered harassment. “It’s fine. Take your scarf with you.”

“I want to have a reason to talk to you again. Please take it.”

Chanyeol didn’t know what to reply so he just nodded, feeling regretful when they parted ways without even asking for the boy’s name.

 

They met again few nights after the first. It was raining and again, cold that prevented Chanyeol do his late night singing. Because of this, the best option on how to spend a rainy night for him is to eat ramen on his favorite ramen place then go home and be comforted by his newly dry cleaned blankets. 

 

Mr. Oh – the ramen place owner is very nice to him while his son, Sehun, his friend since middle school is the complete opposite. The listless looking brat dislikes him because he asks for free extras.

 

If being honest, Chanyeol somehow forgot the boy because juggling work and university is taking up all his energy. His bills are getting out of hand and unpaid and he’s too busy arranging his internship for the next semester to think about a certain raven haired boy. 

 

It was only that one rainy night when he has all the time in the world to think about the stranger and it’s timely that his whole day was bad and unfortunate. He was late in one of his classes (and out of all the units he’s taking, he was late in that certain class with an instructor as terror as Hitler.) and got a special assignment to make up for it. His landlady had reminded (nagged) him to keep his apartment clean because his neighbors are complaining about his trashes rotting outside his door. Damn Jongdae for being a forgetful person.  
Chanyeol’s very certain that his noodles were damn hot, it scalded his tongue and it’s raining so hard it prevented him from earning.

Bad free day making his mind think of the nights ago.

_Raven hair. Small huggable physique. Cute sparkly eyes. Bright smile. Scarf_

_‘I want have a reason to talk to you again.’_

Now Chanyeol’s disappointment brings his wits to end. The boy not showing up made him feel bitter. 

 

Chanyeol gritted on his noodles to displace his irritation, earning a weird stare from the Mr. Oh’s son. Chanyeol is usually happy and he enjoys the ramen but the red haired man is frowning and groaning and mumbling things not that very understandable like there’s no tomorrow. Sehun’s not in the mood to decipher what he’s mumbling but he’s one hundred percent sure it’s not a curse. “Hey. Be irritated somewhere else, Park.”

“I’m not!”

Sehun rolled his eyes, bringing out a bottle of soju in front Chanyeol. “Don’t take your anger our on the noodles. Start talking or I’ll kick you out.”

“I don’t have money for soju –“

“Fuck chanyeol, it’s free because you’re too stingy to spend 2000 won for soju so I’m being nice tonight! Take it!”

 

Free things. Chanyeol likes that. It’s not everyday you get a nice Sehun giving you something so the red haired university student gladly accepted it. 

Somehow, soju made him feel warm. The place not being crowded makes Chanyeol loosen up. There’s a couple far away from them, cuddling as they enjoy sharing a bowl of ramen but Chanyeol couldn’t care less about couples. He’s been single for years to mind.

“So why the hell are you cranky? Got yourself kicked out of your tenement? Some chick rejected you because you’re broke? One of your guitar strings snapped? Dude, if you’re getting pissed by that then your stinginess had leveled up impossibly. A guitar string costs 600 won. Don’t brood about that.”

Chanyeol groans shaking his head as he takes the glass of soju Sehun poured. _Ah that burns his throat._ “It’s just a bad day.”

“We all have that certain bad day but you, my stingy friend don’t brood about simple things like that. What is the real reason? You can tell me. But don’t displace it on me or I’ll ban you.”

 

“There’s this stranger –“ Chanyeol started, remembering the cute boy who never went back to _claim his scarf_ (meet with him). “who makes me really cranky for a reason.”

Sehun raised his brow. “Because?”

“He’s cute.”

“-and?”

“he praised my singing and lent me his scarf because it was cold.”

“stronger details please.”

“I seem to can’t stop thinking about him!” Chanyeol groaned again, scaring the couple away from them. “Well, maybe because I’ve got lots of free time now? But I shouldn’t be thinking of him! I shouldn’t be thinking when he’ll come back and meet me”

“You like him.” Sehun gives this teasing look and Chanyeol rolled his eyes. “You have a crush!”

Liking someone never happened to him for so many years already so he doesn’t know. Maybe. Gender wasn’t actually a big deal for him. He likes who he likes but most of the time, it doesn’t last. Just an attraction that gradually fade overtime.

So maybe the interest he’s having for the cute boy would fade gradually, too. Hopefully.

“Do you know his name, though?” Sehun queers, pouring Chanyeol a shot again. When the red haired shook his head – Sehun doesn’t know if he’s just lazy to speak or he’s still thinking about the stranger – he groaned as well, sighing. “Dude, you should’ve asked for his name. People who lurk in the busy nights of Seoul are easy to track down you know.”

“What are you saying?”

Sehun gave him a judging look. “Look, there are few of your kind who enjoys the night time okay. Damn you’re so stupid for not asking his name!”

“I’m stupid for thinking about him.”

“Still stupid.” Sehun shrugs when Chanyeol buried his face on the table who’s trying to rest his mind for awhile. He couldn’t possibly help that giant idiot finding that person who had his mind in a knot. He’s about to take Chanyeol’s bowl to clean it up but then their door opened, revealing someone that made Sehun’s usually bored face light up. “Baekhyun!”

“Hi Hoon!”

“The usual?”

Even though Chanyeol’s in the verge of losing it, the voice of the person who arrived piqued his interest but nevertheless didn’t moved. 

“Yes. Oh, and can I have free egg?”

“Depends. What do I have in return?”

“A big eye smile from me? I just got my teeth cleaned so I think you’ll be blinded by how white it is.”

“Well, let me see.”

Then it hits Chanyeol. The said owner of the voice who took the empty high chair beside him is familiar and he can’t be wronged. He lifted his head up, so timely to witness that cute yet forced rectangular smile from the stranger who made him brood in such rainy night.

_Baekhyun._

Surprised to see Chanyeol gape at him, Baekhyun flashed him a genuine eye smile.

Sehun raised a brow with what he’s witnessing. Chanyeol was so out of life earlier but then when Baekhyun came, he’s suddenly like electrocuted by some weird force. 

“Oh!” Baekhyun exclaimed. “it’s you!”

“You –“ Chanyeol wanted to form words, really, he did. But his tongue got tied up and he doesn’t know if it’s because of how the stranger’s smile or his timely appearance. 

“You know each other?” Sehun butted in and Baekhyun was the one who break their staring. He nods, like a kid. 

“Yes – oh. No. I haven’t asked his name but yes! We know each other!” Baekhyun looked at Chanyeol who’s still grabbing what’s happening with that eye blinding smile. “Right? You still remember me, right?”

“Yeah.” Chanyeol straightened himself up and looked at Sehun who’s giving him a judging look. It was damn awkward with Sehun around, watching him lose his cool in front of a boy. “I’ve got your scarf with me.”

“Wait – you two.” Sehun butted in again. “Chanyeol is he the person you’re searchin –mmph!”

“Ah! Sehun! One bowl of beef ramen please!” Chanyeol frantically cuts the cook, almost knocking his chair to cover Sehun’s mouth who doesn’t know how to stop talking in the most crucial times. Damn. It would be embarrassing if Baekhyun would know that he’s brooding because of him. 

 

Baekhyun on the other hand watched the two tall men playful with each other. It was a small world, he thought. He wasn’t expecting to see the man who owned the voice that made him feel better days ago. And he’s friends with Sehun, too – a mutual friend who’s very nice to him. When Sehun escaped Chanyeol’s hand, his face was full of disgust and it brought Baekhyun to giggling.

“You’re gross!” Sehun cries, wiping his mouth with the apron he’s wearing. “God, you made me eat your sweat!”

“Why don’t you just get inside the kitchen and make our food, yeah?” 

“Baekhyun.” Sehun called him and Baekhyun quietly waited for what he’s about to say. “Don’t trust this man –“

“What the hell –“ But then Sehun already fled back inside the kitchen, leaving Chanyeol on an awkward situation with Baekhyun who was silently laughing with their cat fight. He nervously turned his head to the shorter and felt his heart somersaulting because of how cute he was. Laughing with his hand covering his mouth.

He thought he’s hearing an angel laughing but he had a bottle of soju earlier. He should go home and stop being weird and awkward. 

“Sehun is so weird.” Baekhyun mumbled, grabbing a glass nearby and filling it with water. Chanyeol’s watching him. _So delicate and graceful._ “But it’s nice to see he’s not sloth-ing around like the usual.”

The smaller then turned to face him with a bright smile. “I’m Baekhyun. Byun Baekhyun”

_You’re pretty as your name._ “Park Chanyeol.”

“It’s funny it took us days to know each other’s name.” 

Chanyeol awkwardly scratches his nape and smiled, swallowed the nervousness before speaking. 

“It’s the first time I’ve seen you hanging around here.” He added. “I’m happy my stomach craved for something hot tonight.”

 

“You – you never came back.” _For me._ “for your scarf. I’m wondering why.”

“Why? Di-did you wait for me?” 

That’s when Chanyeol felt his face heat up. He sat down and turned his head away to hide his blushing but he can feel that Baekhyun wanted to take a look at him, curiously.

“I was hoping I could treat you something.” He whispered, lying. Treating someone is not a thing he enjoys doing. “For the scarf. It made me warm.”

“Then maybe you can do it now?” Baekhyun suggests, moving his chair near Chanyeol. “My meal is worth 5000 won! And definitely, it could warm me up! My stomach in particular. You know how Mr. Oh usually says it – a warm stomach makes everything else comfortably warm!”

Chanyeol wanted to gasp with the price but damn that smile makes him forget how stingy he was. “you sure you want that?”

_You can damn choose the simple pork ramen, that has a thousand and five hundred won difference._

“Yes - oh! And the Melona in the nearby convistore! They have strawberry flavor! I crave for that too!”

_God, that’s 800 won._

Deep inside Chanyeol, he wished he just went straight home and sleep his bad day away and save his wallet from spending but somewhere inside his heart, he’s glad he didn’t.

 

They were quiet, stealing glances at each other. Minutes later, Sehun came back with their bowls of ramen on his hands and a big scowl on his face. Scowling is Sehun’s favorite, that’s normal and probably, he knows that it attracts female customers a lot but the scowl was for Chanyeol and that’s not normal. They bicker a lot but it felt weird like Sehun’s scowls are boring holes in the red haired guy. When distributing the meals, he was all smiles with Baekhyun but when he turned to Chanyeol then the scowling and the crunching of nose happened.

“Ahh! I’ve got three eggs!” Baekhyun exclaimed, getting himself a pair of chopsticks, chanyeol looked on his bowl and surprised to see his bowl eggless, with few meat and lots of vegetables. He looked at Sehun with disbelief and the biased cook just snorted at him.

“I’m so lucky today!”

_No. I’m paying for this. I deserve and egg too!_

“Hey. My bowl deserves an egg, too!” Chanyeol childishly demanded and Sehun just crossed his arms at him. “Sehun! This is unfair!”

“Here here.” Baekhyun spoke all of a sudden, inching suffocatingly close to Chnyeol. Their shoulder touching making the taller red haired man nervous. He can definitely smell Baekhyun and he’s really afraid he might search for his baby like scent in the future. Chanyeol can’t take his eyes off Baekhyun who’s carefully transferring an egg on his bowl. “Sehun must’ve made a mistake. I dont want to be an egg thief especially to the person treating me.”

When Baekhyun looked up to him, god, Chanyeol had the sudden urge to kiss his smile away because it’s making him so uncomfortable. _So damn cute._

Luckily, he was saved by Sehun who coughed at them. They immediately moved away from each other, Baekhyun started digging in his meal. “Chanyeol’s gonna treat you? That’s suspiciously new.”

“Why?”

“That man is Mr. Krabs 2.0, Baekhyun. He dislikes treating people.”

“Hey! That’s being mean! I’m not Mr. Krabs cheap.” Chanyeol defended himself and Sehun just scoffed. He wonders why he’s suddenly mean to him. _Extremely_ mean. He looks at Baekhyun who was biting his lips, looking so troubled. “A bowl of ramen wouldn’t hurt me and my thrifty self.”

“Are you being a gentleman now?”

“I can… pay for this..” Baekhyun mumbled, making Chanyeol hold his arm so he can look at him again but that act shouldn’t supposed to happen.

“No. I’ll pay.”

“But…”

 

“Just enjoy it. I told you I’ll treat you for the scarf”

 

Giving in, Baekhyun smiled to Chanyeol, nodding. 

“So Baek. How’s home school?” Sehun started a conversation again and Chanyeol kept his hand back to himself and started eating. _Homeschool? That means Baekhyun is not an ordinary highschooler?_ Chanyeol wonders what is Sehun’s connection with him. They seem pretty close. “I heard you got a pretty instructor for five months now?”

“Oh. Kyungsoo? Yes. And very smart too. It was good, though he dislikes it when I get out of focus?”

“You always get out of focus.”

“Well, my units became very hard and every lesson makes me sleepy. If I knew college is this hard, I should’ve just worked like you.”

Chanyeol choked on his noodles all of a sudden, making the both look at him weirdly. Baekhyun being nice, offered his own glass of water while Sehun laughed at his friend’s misery.

“You’re a college student? With that height?” Chanyeol asked and the question made Baekhyun pout. 

“Yeah. I am a college student – I turned twenty two last week!” Baekhyun tries to convince Chanyeol but the taller really can’t believe that the small guy beside him is months older. Chanyeol will turn twenty-two in November. “I’m a music major! Second year!”

“Reminds me that Chanyeol’s a music major and a second year too!” Sehun says, amused. “That’s some weird connections between the two of you going on, huh?”

“You’re making it weird, Hoon.” Baekhyun mumbled, still smiling sweetly at Chanyeol. “but Chanyeol has a nice voice and he’s so good moving those fingers along the guitar neck. He makes his own music, too so I’m not surprised to know that he’s a music major, too.”

_Wait. Hold up._

What Baekhyun said is something unknown to everybody and most of the time, left unnoticed. People who pass by him and give him money don’t bother if it’s a mainstream or indie song as long as it’s good in the ears and Chanyeol is not a person who boasts around that he creates his own songs. Not even to Sehun or his classmates.

He has low self-esteem when it comes to his songs since it’s most of the time rejected when he’s offering it to music making companies. 

“There’s this one song I heard that Chanyeol sang about one sided love but it’s masked with a happy tune. It was very beautiful. But sad. I almost cried.”

Chanyeol doesn’t want to put his hopes up but it seems like Baekhyun has been secretly watching him for some quite time now. The red haired didn’t want to cut the enthusiastic boy telling everything he observed to Sehun animatedly so he settled being quiet, enjoying the praises he’s getting. He noticed Sehun carefully listening to Baekhyun, giving satisfying reactions of amusement. 

Chanyeol learned that despite of being music major, Baekhyun doesn’t know how to play anything than the piano. It was a burden to him so he learns English language too at the same time. That means Baekhyun is smart and has all the time and money in the world. The two also talked about Baekhyun’s parents and their visit in the states that leaves him and his older brother alone and dying in their home because of too much intake of canned foods.

Baekhyun’s exaggerations are cute, Chanyeol can help but to smile as he chews his noodles.

“No one can cook so we settle ordering foods, sometimes. Ah! Maybe Hoon can drop by tomorrow and cook for us?”

“Depends. I could get a day off if Kyungsoo would be around? I want to see how cute he is myself.”

“He’s around tomorrow. Don’t make him mad, though. He’s pretty scary.”

Baekhyun’s stories are silly and the more Chanyeol examines him, the more he looks pretty. If Baekhyun has an ounce of admiration for him, Chanyeol would definitely make a way for them to meet again. 

 

When they successfully finished their bowls, it was past midnight and the rain had long gone stopped. They’re the only ones around and Sehun notified Baekhyun that it should be best if he’ll go home or he’s brother would go knocking in their home to ask for his whereabouts. That’s just troublesome. Baekhyun laughed the image of his brother hysterically whining for him because it’s funny. He agreed and thanked the cook for a delicious meal. 

Chanyeol, realizing that he has an eight am class for tomorrow bid his goodbye to Sehun too. Which the cook took suspiciously, again. After paying -- which made his inner self cry because he just spent more than 15 000 won in just a couple of hours – he was surprised to see Baekhyun looking down at his guitar case, his scarf tied on the neck part.

“I still have to treat you melona, right?” Chanyeol mumbled while Sehun went back inside the kitchen to put their bowls in the sink. The smaller man breaks out an eye blinding smile at him and nodded. “Wait for me outside. I still have something to ask Sehun.”

“Why didn’t you asked him earlier?”

“I just remembered.” Chanyeol lied again and Baekhyun clicked it. “It’s about this cheap store that sells guitar strings.”

“Okay then. I’ll wait for you.”

 

Baekhyun bounces his way out, shouting a goodbye to Sehun, which the cook replied to nicely. Chanyeol took Baekhyun’s leave as his chance and followed Sehun inside the kitchen. There he sees Sehun resting his hip on a metal table with crossed arms, frowning at him.

“So Baekhyun is your crush.”

“Is he your crush too?” Chanyeol asked, resting his back on the wall.

“Dude, he’s my neighbor for three years now, don’t taint our platonic relationship.”

“Then why are you scowling at me when you knew he’s the guy I’m talking about.”

“Because I don’t trust you, man. I don’t trust anyone when it’s comes to Baekhyun. This is brotherly protectiveness.”

“Sehun, we’re together since middle school –“

“Have you seen Baekhyun look at you with such sparkly eyes?” Sehun sighed at him, worried. “That screams that he likes you a lot, man.”

“I’m not going to do something bad to him nor take advantage of whatever he feels for me.”

Sehun stayed tight lipped and Chanyeol groaned in frustration. “It’s not like I totally like _like him._ ” The red haired mumbled. _Attracted, yes. but not smitten attracted._ “Yes. I’m unlaid for years now but that doesn’t make me desperate for it. I just want to be friends with Baekhyun because he attracts me, too, but really. I won’t do anything beyond the line to him if that’s what you’re worried about.”

The two tall men stared at each other, quietly seething each other’s sincerity. Until Sehun gave a loud exasperated sigh. “What if you fuck his feelings up – Chanyeol, Baekhyun is nice and very innocent for this world. I’ve seen you be a jerk to all your past flings and –“

 

_Why are you so protective about him?_

“I think Baekhyun’s smart enough to leave and forget about me once he sees that I’m a fucked up jerk when it comes to feelings. But really – I don’t think he’ll last. What’s there to like about me? I’m not an ideal man. You know I’m just a handsome face with nice voice and skilled hands. He still doesn’t know my flaws. For now.”

“You’re not even willing to take responsibility if he falls even deeper for you, right?”

“That won’t happen. Wait till he knew what kind of disappointment I am.”

“In the meantime, be good to him and walk him home.” Sehun gritted his teeth, turning his back to start washing the dishes. “You pay for his bus fare, you doof. I bet he forgot his bus pass again.”

 

Chanyeol nods, happy that his friend doesn’t think badly of him anymore. Having a new friend may help him feel a little lighter especially if it’s someone as bright as Baekhyun. He still doesn’t know where his attraction would bring him but he swears, if he wouldn’t get to know Baekhyun then he’ll regret and brood about it for so long. 

He feels selfish but he can’t stop himself. 

When he went out the ramen place, he sees Baekhyun resting his back on a wall near a lamp post, playing with a red umbrella as he waits for him. He’s looking up at the cleared sky and there was content on his face. Chanyeol got curious and looked up too, seeing bright stars twinkling like Christmas lights.   
It was the first time he took notice of it and made him smile too.  
Quietly, he paced toward the shorter of course, his heavy self would be noticed arriving. “Sorry, it took so long.”

“No. Five minutes wasn’t that long.” Baekhyun shrugs, smiling at him. The twinkle of his eyes alike to the stars up in the sky and Chanyeol got lost staring at it.. “Chanyeol?”

“We should go and get that melona!” the taller freaks out, walking ahead to hide his flustered face. The latter’s short legs tried its best to catch up on Chanyeol and it was successful. Though it was awkward for Chanyeol to walk beside Baekhyun, he can’t help but to notice how the shorter was happily bouncing beside him, humming a song familiar to him. It’s probably a way for Baekhyun not to be left but it was adorable nonetheless.

“How tall are you?” Baekhyun suddenly asked, which made Chanyeol frown. Out of all the questions, why his height? The raven haired could’ve asked something like his daily schedules so he can ask it back to him. Then he can make a way for them to meet again or something but damn, Baekhyun chose to ask for his goddamn height out of the blue.

“Hundred eighty five centimeters.”

“Wow. Intimidating.”

“I get that a lot.” Chanyeol chuckles, inching a little close because Baekhyun’s warmth is something he can settle to because it suddenly became cold. “Your height makes me think that you’re a high schooler at first.”

“I get that a lot too!” Baekhyun grumpily scrunched his nose. “Police officers mistake me for being a minor and they always want to call my parents to reprimand them not to let their kids out at night. I’m an adult!”

“A short adult.”

“Hey do you want to fight?” Baekhyun frowns at Chanyeol but really, a small guy is no match to a big healthy man like him physically so the taller just laughed it off. “Hey!”

“Grow a little centimeters more and go back to me, then we fight.”

“As if I’d grow taller! I’m twenty-two! Males stop growing at the age of nineteen -”

“That’s a lie – Sehun’s still growing. I am still growing. Your growth hormones must’ve hate you.”

The older huffs cutely, frustrated with his teasing and it brought Chanyeol to laughter. 

“I really hate it when I have to stay in the police station and wait for my older brother to confirm my identity. It ruins my late night stroll.”

“Why do you like strolling at night? If you’d do it during the day then you won’t be bothered getting jailed for an hour or two.”

Baekhyun tensed all of a sudden and Chanyeol saw that. “I – I”

Chanyeol waited for the shorter to continue and wondered if he said something wrong. 

“I have day classes.” Baekhyun smiles but it looks like he had given a lot effort to give it to Chanyeol. “I couldn’t possibly cut classes since I’m being homeschooled and Kyungsoo would never let me live if I skip his classes..”

“Don’t you want to attend university?” Chanyeol asked, this time, they reached the convistore and he was the one who opened the door for Baekhyun. “It’s fun. My university holds concourse every December for music majors and it’s grand. A week-long celebration for us. Don’t you want to participate to such kind of event?”

Baekhyun didn’t know what to react with that but Chanyeol knows the shorter was interested with what he’s sharing.

“Wait – are you homeschooled since gradeschool?”

Baekhyun nods.

“That’s – “ Chanyeol trailed behind Baekhyun, trying to think of another word that wouldn’t make Baekhyun feel bad of his life.

“Sad? Boring? Yes. It is.” Baekhyun cut right through him, opening the freezer that has variety of chilled treats but he’s giggling, suddenly contemplating if he should pick the strawberry or try the other flavors available. “I have like four or five friends in my whole life – add my brother and Kyungsoo because of it. And whenever I meet new people, I tend to freak them out because I talk too much like right now – do I freak you out?”

“No. Not really.”

“Really?”

“Really.”

Chanyeol’s affirmation made Baekhyun’s cheek hurt from smiling too much. That’s a relief. “Homeschool bores me to death most of the time but there’s nothing I can do to change that.” 

“That’s not true.” Chanyeol mumbled, getting what he and Baekhyun preferred, remembering that he used to believe that he can’t do anything to attain the things he want to be but look at him – though he lost his family, he got a sense of pride for standing up in making a little difference for himself. He’s not totally happy because he misses his family’s care but that’s life. “You can always do something if you badly want something for yourself.”

It had put Baekhyun to daze and was only pulled out of it when Chanyeol tapped him on the shoulder, with a strawberry melona and a banana ice cap on his other hand. They went together to the cashier and the lady incharge of punching their items blushed really hard when Chanyeol smiled at her.

“Ah. Can I ask something?” chanyeol spoke and the lady almost lost her composure. “What’s the schedule of the bus nearby?”

“Uh- uh… well. It would take at least ten minutes for the next bus to a-arrive?”

The way Chanyeol pursed his lips with a small smile was really handsome for Baekhyun and he can’t stop looking at the taller. When the lady gave the things they brought, Chanyeol turned to him and gave a wide smile, his right eye twitching and it made Baekhyun feel hot particularly on his face.

“You okay?”

“Y-eah.”

“Let’s go so we can catch the bus.”

 

The walk to the bus stop was quiet, still shy to get a little closer with each other so they set a one foot distance. The excuse was the iced treats stuffed in their mouths but the silence they’re having isn’t as awkward like earlier. It’s more like a silence enjoying each other’s company while they stuff themselves. 

The two of them occupied the shed and Baekhyun busied himself watching the vehicles passed by. Few people using the sidewalk, trying to warm themselves up. The night life slowly dying.

“Do you live somewhere near the fifth district?” Baekhyun questions out of the blue making Chanyeol look at him with the banana flavored cap on his mouth and it made Baekhyun’s heart skip a beat.

Hundred eighty five centimeters tall man’s cute is very disarming.

“We share the same route.” That’s a lie again. Chanyeol lives somewhere near his university, in the second district. He should take the bus on the other side of where they are. It’s a good thing Sehun mentioned that they are neighbors for it saved Chanyeol for embarrassing himself in asking where Baekhyun lives. “Baekhyun, can I ask something?”

“Hmm?”

“Aren’t you scared of going home with a stranger like me?”

“No. We have a mutual friend and it’s Sehun. He’s not very friendly and I know you’re his friend because you’re a good person.”

“How about walking around Seoul during night time?”

“Not really.” Baekhyun answers, finishing his melona as clean as possible. “It’s not like I go and lurk around to secluded places. I have one or two destinations and it’s crowded with people most of the time.”

“It’s dangerous for someone small like you.”

“I know hapkido! Want me to roundhouse kick you?”

Chanyeol got scared with what he learned and he’s thankful he was saved by the bus arriving in front of them. Small guys are damn scary to irritate. 

Baekhyun was the first one to get in and just like as Sehun told him, the older had a hard time searching for his bus pass and it will take them forever to enter if Chanyeol wouldn’t swipe his own on the ticketing machine – which surprised Baekhyun. The raven haired was about to say thanks but the bus started moving all of a sudden, making him lose balance and almost fall face first on the floor if Chanyeol hasn’t took hold of him by the waist on one hand, his other hand on the railing.

But Chanyeol did and saved him from acquiring injuries that will surely make his older brother faint. 

Their bodies were so close and if their nervousness with the proximity they have didn’t clouded up their minds, then they might have heard each other’s heart outrageously beating inside their chests.

Being close to Chanyeol made Baekhyun lose his mind and being stared by the taller makes his body numb to process what his brain orders him to do.

_Baekhyun, push him away._ That’s what his mind tells him but Baekhyun wanted to stay like that for awhile. 

It was Chanyeol who carefully distanced himself, making sure that Baekhyun has his balance again before letting go of him. The bus driver had apologized for what happened and then they made their way further inside. 

The bus wasn’t crowded but the only best option they have was the empty two-seater near the back part of the bus. There are empty chairs but too far away from each other. 

“Do you want the seat near the window?” Chanyeol asked him and Baekhyun shyly nodded. He was the first again to take a seat then Chanyeol followed, settling his guitar in between his legs. 

That was the last exchange of conversation they have all throughout the bus ride. Baekhyun kept on fidgeting his hands on his lap with his head bowed down while Chanyeol stayed quiet, stealing glances. Both kept on replaying the incident happened, making their hearts flutter nice. 

When the fifth district comes to view, Baekhyun arranged himself to say proper goodbye to Chanyeol and thank him for a nice night. The bus halted to stop and the smaller guy noticed how gentleman Chanyeol is, standing up to give way to him. “Thank you for tonight.”

“Save your goodbye later. I’m walking you home.” 

With a grin, Chanyeol went on his way down the bus leaving a dumbfounded Baekhyun who can’t process what was happening. He stood on his spot, seeing Chanyeol wait for him down, on their street. He felt red and embarrassed when the driver called him out if he’s going to leave or not and it’s a record because he didn’t tripped on his way down. 

Chanyeol looked around the area. “Is your house far?”

“You don’t have to walk me home – hurry and get a bus.”

“Sehun asked me to walk you home.” Chanyeol told him and it made Baekhyun’s heart ache and disappointed, knowing that Chanyeol was just doing everything because Sehun asks him too. The taller noticed the sudden dropping of Baekhyun’s shoulders and got the feeling that he said something wrong. “I want to walk you home, too.”

Baekhyun looks up to him, confused. 

“Why?”

“Because …” Chanyeol sweats nervously. He can’t tell that he’s interested spending time with him and knowing him or it will be awkward. “You’re the first person who noticed I perform my own songs and liked it.”

“Wa-wasnt that a given information – sure Sehun knows too?”

“No, Sehun doesn’t know and it’s not a given information.” Chanyeol bends down, leaning his face close to Baekhyun. “Unless you’re someone who has been watching me perform in the shadows. Which I think you are.”

“I – I – I’m not a creep!” was all Baekhyun screamed at Chanyeol’s face. He wanted the ground to swallow him. He doesn’t want to see Chanyeol’s smile and think about the reality that Chanyeol already knows now that he has been watching him for a while. He doesn’t know how Chanyeol knew his secret and it’s impossible he heard him from somebody else because Kyungsoo’s not the type of person who expose others. They don’t even know each other.

Because of his extreme embarrassment, Baekhyun turned on his heels and started walking as fast as he could so he can hide himself from Chanyeol forever. 

And then he heard Chanyeol singing – enjoying the way to his home. He has his hands on his pockets and Baekhyun can definitely hear him loud and clear because their area was quiet. 

It was a sad love song. Baekhyun can recall it and it made him slow down so he can hear Chanyeol clearly. 

_I can’t overcome the sadness in my heart,_  
Another one of my sleepless nights, I endure it once more,  
I really don’t mind the sadness,  
It absentmindedly wakes me up again in the morning. 

_The injury seems worse than i thought it’d be,_  
The pain seems to dig in deeper than i thought it would,  
In the countless nights i spent resenting you,  
It feels like i’m in hell. 

_Please just stay by my side, please remain here,_  
Don’t let go of my hand as you’re holding it in yours,  
If this takes you a step further away from me,  
All i have to do is take a step closer, isn’t it? 

 

“You like this song, right?” Chanyeol smiled at him when they were walking side by side again. The blush on Baekhyun’s face can be seen clearly because of his pale skin. 

“It’s beautiful. And sad. Like you’re asking someone to comfort you but there wasn’t any and any one can’t be a substitute because you’re asking for a specific someone who can never will hear you. Someone who will never come back.”

“I wrote it when I broke up with my first girlfriend.“ Chanyeol shared and though there’s something unsettling inside Baekhyun, he listened. “It was the first time I couldn’t cry – I was physically exhausted and I just had lasik surgery so crying is not an ideal thing to do. And then I made a song.”

“She’s lucky.” Baekhyun mumbled out of the blue. “Someone made a beautiful song for her.”

“She’s the inspiration, yes, but the song’s not dedicated for her.”

Hearing those words from the taller, Baekhyun can’t help but to smile again, somehow the unsettling feeling was comforted. They walk in silence again – Chanyeol constantly humming and Baekhyun enjoying it by swaying his head like a kid. When Baekhyun stopped in front a white three story house, Chanyeol knows it’s the time to say goodbye.

Baekhyun’s house is simple but it can never deny the life status he has. The smaller turned to Chanyeol and gave a very polite bow. 

“Thank you for - ” He beamed, then noticing his scarf again, in battle with himself if he should ask the scarf back or not. “- Tonight. It was fun. “

Chanyeol smiles at him, then untied the scarf on his guitar case and wore it on neck. “I’m going to keep it for a while.” 

“Eh? ” why

“I need to have a reason for you to come and meet me again.”


	2. a face in the crowd

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Baekhyun remembers the time when he first saw Chanyeol, singing his heart out on the streets of Myeongdong

 

 

 

****

 

 

Baekhyun remembers the time when he first saw Chanyeol, singing his heart out on the streets of Myeongdong, two months before he had the courage to talk to him for. It was after he was held in the police station for being mistaken as a minor (for the nth time again) and nothing actually happened right on that day. He got scolded by Kyungsoo on the very first day of their meeting, his brother ate his strawberry yoghurt without asking permission and his mother forgot the strawberries he’d been dying to have for days.

 

 

 It made Baekhyun really moody and the only thing that will save him from moping around was the hobby of him taking strolls at night, exploring and exploring and exploring the places people usually goes to during day. Myeongdong is a lively place during the night time too, with colorful city lights filled crowded of different people going to one shop or another. Baekhyun, on the other hand was one of the people who enjoyed hopping from one food stall to another, trying all the street foods his eyes could see and his wallet could afford.

 

 

He felt like he’s a foreigner, getting free from kind ahjummas because of his cute. Sometimes, he dislikes being cute because his cute makes him look young and weak but being cute has its perks too. You get old ladies nice to you and give you free food, his brother can never say no to him and get angry and thinking about those goods make him feel good being cute.

 

 

Though he wouldn’t admit that, ever.  

 

 

He ate to his heart’s content, not minding where his feet led him until he heard someone singing, not far from where he enjoys freshly cooked odeng with out of this world spicy sauce. He was never a fan or spicy foods but the sauce was nicely made and Baekhyun can never turn his back on that. 

 

Chanyeol wasn’t that hard to locate. Who wouldn’t miss a bundle of bright red hair with nice singing voice that made everyone turn their heads, curious as to where such wonderful sounds are coming? Baekhyun was one of those. Always curious.

 

 

When he saw Chanyeol up close, his eyes closed as he smiled to every lyric he sang, baekhyun’s heart fluttered. Intensely.

 

 

 It was starting to get chilly and he noticed that the red haired man was clothed thinly, the tip of his nose and ears red and his plush lips chapped but still looked very kissa –

 

 

_Baekhyun, wanting to kiss a stranger is creepy!_ He panicked mainly because he never had felt something like that to strangers. They interests him, Baekhyun wanting to know why a man in suit frowning as he takes a call or why a lady walks with her head bowed down, bumping few shoulders in the process but never to a point that Baekhyun wanted to kiss them.

 

It was weird and Baekhyun had hurried home and sleep his weirdness away but even in his dreams, he was haunted by chanyeol, smiling at him and the next day, he wanted to see him again.

 

 

Myeongdong, then had become his favorite place to visit. Most of the time, he would buy something to eat and search for Chanyeol’s whereabouts. He knew that the musician changes his place depending on where there’s a crowd. Most of the time, he stays at the square. Sometimes, he settles in the mini park. Baekhyun on the other hand, would maintain a careful distance where he can watch and enjoy Chanyeol’s performance as he eat his street foods.

 

 

By watching, Baekhyun learned the little things about Chanyeol. Every song, he would say his _thank you_ loudly. He also wears thin clothes and sometimes would flirt with highs school girls that pass him by with his cheeky smile. It was amazing how Chanyeol can make people squeal because of his charms. Even Baekhyun squeal whenever he laughs when his voice croaks, apologizing shyly after. He has a variety of snapbacks and whenever he wears one makes his ear a little bit prominent and noticeable and cute.

 

 

 

But the best thing Baekhyun learned about Chanyeol was that he _sings_ self composed songs – Baekhyun thinks it’s self composed because he never heard of it even though he’s an avid netizen especially when it comes to music. He knows the latest releases, indie or mainstream and follows a lot of singer and composers and he never heard any of them sing what Chanyeol performs.

 

Because honestly, it was only Chanyeol who sings about how good instant noodles with whip cream on a cold night is and how ferrets had once became a big part of his childhood life. Chanyeol’s the only who sings the saddest songs with such bright yet restrained smile that made Baekhyun fall for him.

 

Every night that passed by and the raven haired’s feelings for Chanyeol grew and grew and grew and it made Baekhyun gather up his courage to finally talk to him because he can no longer settle in just watching.

 

He even gave his favorite scarf to him.

 

 

****

 

Chanyeol had always been handsome no matter what he does for Baekhyun. He could only sigh contentedly as he takes in Chanyeol’s beautiful face. Whether his yawning or stuffing his face with convenient store food, he’s always eye hurting handsome but the night after their formal introduction with each other was different.

 

_Heartwarmingly different._

 

Well, at least for Baekhyun, it is.

 

The square is filled with people – most of them were high school students from the schools nearby Myeongdong, seated on picnic mats, huddled together because it was cold. Baekhyun can feel the chill in his bones even if he wears the hand woven sweater his grandmother made for him last year. There’s obviously an event, a high stage set up on the place where Chanyeol usually sits down and Baekhyun not that far from it – he can’t perfectly see Chanyeol on the back stage, tuning his guitar strapped on his body.

 

 

Chanyeol was wearing a plaid red polo, – too thin for Baekhyun – faded denim jeans that hugged his long legs nicely and a worn out black sneakers finishing his cute manly appearance. His red hair was hidden in a black cap and his scarf, neatly tied on his neck. Baekhyun smiles with the sight, his heart felt like being struck by cupid’s arrow as he held onto the warm canned drink tea he bought in the nearby convenience store when he sees a lady leaning close to Chanyeol, whispering something in the taller’s ear as if they’re close enough to do that. The raven haired man can’t stop himself from being jealous and feel a little bit insecure. Chanyeol didn’t look like he minds the closeness, flashing a friendly smile, nodding to everything the lady says to him.

 

 

Baekhyun shakes his head, shrugging off the bitterness he’s feeling. It’s not right. _No – no. Baekhyun. You can’t be jealous over everyone. .Of course, everyone would like him! What’s there not to like?? Also! Chanyeol has all the freedom in the world to talk to whoever he wants and he’s not like he’s your boyfriend! Walking you home is not an easy way for you to be boyfriends, don’t get to ahead of yourself! He’s just nice._

 

 

Helping himself, he placed his interest on knowing what the event all about was. Baekhyun had focused on eavesdropping the couple next to his table.

 

 

It was an event hosted by the music majors of Seoul University. A fund raising event for selected charities and that made Baekhyun’s heart happy. Chanyeol’s participating to a fund raising event just made him tenfold more handsome than the usual. It was a free show, though. No fees for you to enjoy the performance of the college students. It’s up to you if you’ll give something in return but Baekhyun thinks everyone’s willing to give some donations since he had seen high school students putting bills in an envelope.

 

He wanted to give too but he doesn’t know how. It was timely when a volunteer’s doing rounds, giving envelopes to those who wished to give donations.

 

 

The event started few minutes after Baekhyun placed all the cash he got on his wallet inside his envelope. That’s more than 20 000 won and Baekhyun doesn’t regret giving such amount because he knows it would help others in need. Lots of musicians performed and Baekhyun’s ears are more than satisfied because they’re such good singers. He noted few soundcloud accounts of the performers who introduced themselves and would search for them once he gets home. He didn’t even noticed how three hours had passed because he was enjoying as he waits for Chanyeol’s turn to perform.

 

 

The crowd whined when the emcees announced that the next performer would be the last one. They’ve sent their deepest and heartfelt gratitude and they are very hopeful that the next time they would hold an event, lots of people would give financial help.

 

The announcement, though, made Baekhyun’s heart speed up. _Chanyeol’s up next._ Everyone around him suddenly disappeared when Chanyeol awkwardly went his way to the stage where the microphone stand was placed. Chanyeol coughed awkwardly; drinking the bottle of water he bought with him and placed it down so he can position his hands on his guitar. “Hi.” His deep voice echoing through the speakers awkwardly. “I hope my song wouldn’t bore you. I’m Park Chanyeol, by the way. So uh… yeah. Hope you’ll enjoy.”

 

 

Baekhyun wanted to cry when Chanyeol started his performance, strumming on his guitar. He cant take his eyes of Chanyeol as the tall man smiled to the crowd, pulling hearts of high schoolers with his coy grins. When Chanyeol started singing, it was the only sound that was registered in his brain. The melody, the lyrics, the song.

 

The lyrics of the song was about someone’s memory of first date. Nervous to fuck up a typical date. Nervous to disappoint. Nervous to make a fool out of himself. It was all fluffy, like Chanyeol was narrating how he’s first date went on.

 

[ _‘I’d never thought I’d found a love like this._ ](https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=0Wef0RCCcHg)

[ _There’s no need to hide the feeling we get._ ](https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=0Wef0RCCcHg)

[ _Whenever we touch we can’t resist…_ ](https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=0Wef0RCCcHg)

 

 

_We go back to our first date.._

 

_Our first kiss.’_

 

Baekhyun never had a chance to date someone and instead of getting insecure with that person who was Chanyeol’s first – Baekhyun imagined himself on her shoes instead. Going to a movie house with Chanyeol on the first date, leaning onto him when he feels sleepy or cold, taking their time to walk and talk about everything they can think of because it’s a way for them to know each other really well and ending their date with a shared kiss because –

 

Baekhyun froze on his thoughts the moment he catches Chanyeol’s eyes spot him. Baekhyun had rubbed his eyes to check if it was real but the moment he opened his eyes again, Chanyeol’s attention was on the other side already.

 

_‘she looks at me and she can see the chance I want to take’_

 

Baekhyun knows his heart stopped from beating the moment Chanyeol looked to his place again, smiling as he sang the lyrics of his song. Positive that Chanyeol had spotted him and that smile makes Baekhyun think that he’s delighted to see him there.

 

_‘She moves in close and takes my breath away.’_

 

_Heart, don’t get hurt if brain would imagine something so impossible like that, alright?_ Baekhyun reminded himself since he knows He can never stop himself from giving himself short lived happiness like that.

 

 

 

When Chanyeol finished his performance, everyone clapped for him, cheered to sing another song and feeling _regretful_ he has to leave the stage already. Chanyeol awkwardly didn’t know what to do and was gladly saved by the emcees on time.

 

While they were saying their last remarks and the people started to search for the boxes where they can put their donations to leave, Baekhyun took his chance to find Chanyeol in the back stage – which he had no difficulties in doing so because he knows Chanyeol even with his back showing. Holding the can of green tea for self support in calming his nerves down, he walked slowly to where Chanyeol is and was stopped from calling him when two girls appeared to his side.

 

“Hi! You’re Park Chanyeol, right?”

 

“Yeah. Can I help you?”

 

“That performance was great and we’re wondering if we could take a photo with you!”

 

Chanyeol generously nodded and the girls took out their phones. Baekhyun watched them as they inched closer as possible to Chanyeol, making his heart ache.

 

Stupid heart, aching in the most impossible time.

 

The second girl had her chance and boldly forced Chanyeol to rest his arms onto her shoulders smiling as her companion took several snaps of them together, looking so couple-y and all Baekhyun did was to turned his back because he can never take that closeness they’re having.

 

It’s too painful to see and Baekhyun doesn’t want what he’s feeling. It was not right. It will never be right.

 

 

 

 

****

 

When Chanyeol went down the stage, it was Jongdae who had welcomed him with a big tight hug, hitting his back with hand. “Yeol you dumb shit you freaking make me cry!”

 

“Get off Jongdae, I’m feeling your hard on.”

 

“It’s goddamn cold, let my penis be!” Jongdae’s smiles at him even though Chanyeol had push him away, being grossed with the taller’s hug. “You make your own songs? Man! That’s not a freaking failure like what you told me earlier!” then there’s a punch on his stomach with an overly excited Jongdae.

 

“Pure luck that I didn’t messed up.” Chanyeol mumbles humbly, rubbing his stomach because the jab Jongdae gave was painful. “there. You’d be a nice neighbor to me now, right?”

 

“Yeah man. My respect for you just leveled up and damn, it’s the first time I knew your surname was park. Thought it was just Chan Yeol.”

 

“Dude we’ve been neighbors for three years now. Same major. Same university.”

 

“Yeah. I know. Three years of getting all the secondhand nagging from Mrs. Hong because you always forget to put your trash to where it should belong –“

 

“Damn you for putting me in your spam box.”

 

“Well, you keep on giving me text messages –“

 

“Well maybe you shouldn’t have given me your number in the first place.”

 

“If I knew you’d always ask me to put out your trash then I shouldn’t have talked to you and welcome you in the neighborhood –“

 

“Are we going to fight again because of this?”

 

“Naah.” Jongdae smiles cheekily, his prominent cheekbones getting more prominent. “Thanks for being a substitute. You saved me, man. I’ll be nicer to you from now on.”

 

 

The participation in the event was purely out of Chanyeol’s plans. Actually, he was slightly pissed because there was a stage built on where he usually stays and that meant another ‘no-earning-night’. But then he saw the poster of the event – a charity event at that and Chanyeol really felt guilty after feeling pissed. It was for the greater good while he’s just only aware of his own and that was really selfish.

 

He also noticed that it was hosted by the organization of music majors in Seoul University and he wanted to facepalm himself  for not knowing. It’s not like he would volunteer help like a performance but he could give manual power because all he can see were ladies working, running to and fro, checking if everything’s alright. He’s part or that organization (inactive member just because) too and he feels lame for not contributing anything.

 

And he knows he’s too late to offer any help so Chanyeol decided that he’ll just go to Hongdae and earn something there.

 

He wanted to meet up with Baekhyun, too since he’s hopeful that the raven haired would meet with him again. But that night’s just not the night for them to meet again.

 

He was about to leave when someone called his name – which happened to be a panicking and shivering Jongdae. “Chanyeol! Is that you? Yeol!? Its you my nice handsome lamp post of a neighbor!”

 

Jongdae praising him means favors. Favors are free and if he’s stingy, Jongdae is ten times even more so Chanyeol pretended to not hear him, walked fast without turning back.

 

Jongdae got short legs, sure, he wouldn’t catch up on him but he underestimated his neighbor too much. He was pulled in the arm harshly, back to the stage, getting explanations why his sudden appearance saved the shorter guy.

 

“One of the performers can’t make it tonight and I know this is all of a sudden but please perform in his place and save me from being lectured by the president!”

 

“Wait, what the fuck hold up –“ Chanyeol pulls his arm hastily, making Jongdae look at him. “Don’t just drag people in this event, Jongdae –“

 

“You’re not just a mere person, Chanyeol! You’re a music major! Help me!”

 

“Why don’t you stand up there and perform? Surely you could sing and slay She’s Gone –“

 

“Chanyeol, my voice is not in good condition!” Jongdae whined and Chanyeol just gave him a judging look. “Okay so the last performer is hella handsome my cheekbones can never compete to that and here you are, the answer to my prayers! You’ll draw in more crowds, I’m positively sure you will because you our uni’s chan-candy –“

 

“Don’t even mention that ugly nickname – is Kwanghee still calling me like that?”

 

“Yeah. He introduced you to some oggling freshmen –“ Jongdae cuts himself before he gets sidetracked. “Anyways! It’s just this one night, Yeol. I know I’m asking your precious night of earning money but please. Perform for us. I know you’ll do well.”

 

Chanyeol bit his lips as he recalled about the last time he fucked up a recital, three years ago. He performed a composition of his professor who had high expectations from him. It’s supposed to be his ticket to Berlin University as a scholar but he failed amusing the sponsors. He still doesn’t know why he fucked it up but he’s sure of one thing – he never joined or participated recitals and concourse after that.

 

“It’s just like you’re performing every night –“

 

_No. I might disappoint everyone in your team. I don’t want you to expect from me._

 

“- but the thing is you won’t get any profits in this one! But think about the kids and people in need you can help! Come on, Yeol. You’ll feel light and better even if you don’t have money inside your guitar case.” Jongdae adds, trying to persuade his unsure tall friend.

 

“Ask me anything but not performing.”

 

“Yeol! Just give it a shot!” Jongdae continued his persuasions, shaking Chanyeol  in the shoulders and he almost fell on the dizziness that came after – “There’s food.”

 

“That’s too weak for a bribe.”

 

“I’ll pay for your bus fare! That’s being too generous already! Oh! I’ll give you three canned beers too!”

 

Chanyeol then smiled, still doubting himself but he can never let a friend in need down. Maybe participating wouldn’t hurt anyone. And besides, he really wants to see Baekhyun again. “Prepare two meals for me, Jongdae.”

 

“Wow? You eat that much?”

 

 

“I have a friend coming.” _Unsure though._ “You can slash the beer in the list of the bribe you’ll give me in return for an extra meal.”

 

“Naah. I’ll give it to you.”

 

The next thing Chanyeol knew, he’s being pulled and being introduced to the staff. They welcomed him warmly, giving him drinks while they wait for the program to formally start. For Chanyeol, it was really nice to get surrounded by the people with the same vibe like him. He met their organization’s president, Minseok who has Jongdae wrapped around his finger. His neighbor was very behaved and he’s usual playful character turned into a focused one and that’s very nice to see.

 

But knowing only Jongdae made Chanyeol shy. It was nice that some of his school mates are smiling at him, greeting and all but he’s not really good with dealing new people so he stayed in the sidelines and started checking if his guitar is in good condition. He still doesn’t have a particular song in mind but then he thought of Baekhyun.

 

He looked around, hoping to find a cute raven haired shorty and it must be because he wished to all the gods to let him see baekhyun so much, said shorty located, not far from the stage is. Baekhyun was seated alone on a table, holding his phone up and taking pictures of the sky, the stage, of the people then a selfie with a peace sign. Chanyeol finds it amusing that Baekhyun plays well with himself and his pale face is quite a standout, too.

 

_Very beautiful._

 

He was so engrossed in watching Baekhyun when he was cut off a lady staff approach him. Chanyeol had seen her in their building few times before but he’s not aware of her name. She came to help him with the microphone to be attached on him but Chanyeol shyly declined. “I don’t want to embarrass everyone if i go off tune or forget the lyric so I’ll just use the mic on stage. And my guitar is old so can you help me and do something about it?”

 

 

But the lady staff frowned and didn’t heard him because of the music playing to amuse the waiting audience so she ended up leaning closely to him – which made him more awkward and embarrassing. He tends to get nervous around people and twice when it’s a girl. It must be because he’s in guilt for all the jerkiness he gave from his previous flings and Chanyeol thinks he doesn’t deserve any woman’s kindness. When they understood each other, Chanyeol looked at Baekhyun’s place and saw him busy putting cash in the envelope provided by the organizers.

 

 

Even with just simple task, Baekhyun still look delicate and cute and Chanyeol wanted to take a closer look of the raven haired already.

 

 

The program took like forever for Chanyeol certainly because he just wanted to spend time with Baekhyun but he’s the last in line to perform. While Baekhyun’s enjoy everyone’s performance, he enjoyed watching him.

 

 

Every time something would amaze Baekhyun, his face wouldn’t hide it. It was bright but not hurtful in the eyes and he’d clapped too much, mumbling ‘daebak’ with a big eye smile on his face. Chanyeol wanted to see Baekhyun’s expressions too when he watches him. He was curious and little bit envious because he’s giving too good reactions to everyone.

 

Too caught up being envious with everyone else, he forgot to think about the song he should perform.

 

When it was his turn, he panicked because he still doesn’t have a song in his mind. His heart and blood pumping incredibly fast in his body and it was a blessing that he didn’t tripped on stage. There are too many eyes watching him – all were expectant and it made his chest heavy.

 

_No. Don’t expect from me._

 

His eyes didn’t know where to look but it somehow landed to where Baekhyun is – who was faithfully watching him. Focused with his hands clasped together. Unlike the other eyes Chanyeol seen in the audience, Baekhyun’s aren’t expectant but comforting, cheering for him and full of trust that he can do well.

 

 

He took a deep breath and discarded all the nervousness and fear he has in his body and introduced himself. It gave him time to think of a song that could definitely interest one specific person in the crowd.

 

_For the first time, Chanyeol wanted to do well for someone else and not for himself._

 

It felt like a breath of fresh air as he sang his song in front of the audience and even though they didn’t know what the song is, they gave out positive reactions, swinging their heads side to side, clapping along the melody and it made Chanyeol really happy.

 

He’s happy that people enjoys his music. He’s happy that Baekhyun’s attention was only at him though he felt scared to look at the raven haired because he knows he’ll feel something exploding in his chest when he did. It took him almost to chorus to finally look at Baekhyun, who got surprised and thought his eyes were betraying him.

 

_You’re so cute_  was all Chanyeol’s thinking as he smiled at Baekhyun. _I’m happy you’re here._

 

 

Chanyeol was very eager to get down on stage right after and go to Baekhyun but then he was prevented by an overly excited Jongdae and two girls wanting to take a photo with him. He doesn’t really mind being all friendly but he’s really shy especially when one of the girls asked him to do a skinship. While the two girls praise him, Chanyeol zipped his guitar back on its case and his eyes searched for Baekhyun. He wasn’t at his table and Chanyeol was disappointed, thinking that maybe Baekhyun had left for a reason.

 

And maybe his eyes are trained to spot a certain raven haired shorty amidst the crowd, almost leaving the area. Chanyeol sees Baekhyun approaching a lady staff and before he could leave, Chanyeol quickly excused himself to the girls talking to him and dashed to where Baekhyun is.

 

 

“Can – can you please hand this to Park Chanyeol?” Baekhyun mumbled shyly as he handed a black plastic bag to the lady staff. Chanyeol stood behind him, catching his breath. “He’s very tall with bright red hair! Handsome too! He’s very easy to recognize.”

 

“hand it over personally.” Chanyeol said, making Baekhyun unable to move. “What’s with the rush, going home without even greeting me?”

 

When the lady staff excused himself, Baekhyun courageously turned around to face the tall man behind him, who had his heart aching again with his cheeky smile. He’s always handsome and always giving his heart small panic attacks with everything he does.

 

“Give me that.” Chanyeol whispers, asking for the plastic bag which Baekhyun gave right away because it was for him but what stunned him is when the taller took hold of him in the wrist, pulling him to walk closely beside him. “You’re not going home. Not yet.”

 

Baekhyun couldn’t process anything but the warmth on his wrist and the rough hand holding him firmly.  Until Chanyeol knock a fist on his forehead, gently, to pull him out of dazing.

 

“Stop dazing and listen to me.”

 

“Sorry I – I…“

 

“I’m going to introduce you to someone. He’s always overly excited and shouty so I hope he won’t freak you out.” Chanyeol looked at him for a moment with a comforting smile on his face that made Baekhyun nod. “He’s nice.”

 

_Your hand feels nice._ Baekhyun thought. “Whe-where are we heading?”

 

“Ah!  Jongdae!” Chanyeol suddenly shouted, waving his hand to a guy as tall as Baekhyun with a nice cat-like smile. Called Jongdae rushed to where they are holding to containers that appear to hold meals for Baekhyun. He immediately hid himself behind Chanyeol, hiding his wrist being held too.

 

“Oh! Your companion?” Jongdae asked, peeking at Bakehyun who had his bowed head to him. “He’s shy, yeol.”

 

“This is Baekhyun.” Chanyeol pulled Baekhyun to his side and Baekhyun would surely want the ground to swallow him if he saw  the sly look on Jongdae’s face upon seeing Chanyeol holding him in the wrist. “Baekhyun, this is Jongdae, he’s my neighbor and we’re from the same university.”

 

“Hi. I’m Baekhyun.”

 

“Nice meeting you, Baekhyun.” Jongdae gave him a pat on the shoulder. “Be careful with this man!” he kids, making Chanyeol frown at him.

 

“why do you always make me look bad?”

 

“Stop whining and here – take this.” Jongdae shrugs, pushing the meal boxes to Chanyeol, making the taller release his hold onto Baekhyun’s hand. “There’s a quiet spot behind the stage. You can peacefully eat there.”

 

“Arent you going to come with us?”

 

“The president wants to say last few words to us before we eat. I’ll follow the both of you right after!”

 

With that, Jongdae sprinted to where his team was and left chanyeol and Baekhyun together again. Baekhyun felt at lost, missing Chanyeol’s hand on him, making him space off again. The taller nudge him from dazing, motioning Baekhyun to follow. It was a short walk and luckily found an empty table for them.

 

Baekhyun sat down immediately, taking the meal boxes so Chanyeol can settle his things down. He was expecting Chanyeol to take the place across him but the taller didn’t – instead, he made Baekhyun move so he can sit beside him, too close, it made Baekhyun’s heart constrict again and again and again. “So cold.” Chanyeol mumbled, stuttering because his lips are freezing. “God, so cold. I’m glad you’re warm, Baekhyun.”

 

“you’re too big, why are you shivering too much?”

 

“Is being tall like me cuts off my privilege to feel cold?”

 

Baekhyun giggled when he sees snot running down on Chanyeol’s nose. He pulled out a hanky from his pocket and wiped it carefully. It surely was too bold and intimate and he didn’t know why his body acts on its own but Chanyeol seems like someone who should be taken care of. The red haired doesn’t seem to mind the sudden action he did that’s why Baekhyun continued cleaning his nose.

 

“you should wear thicker clothes next time if you’re this sensitive to cold.”

 

“I’m not sensitive to cold. It’s just extremely cold tonight.”

 

“Should we eat ramen later?” Baekhyun asks, arranging his scarf on Chanyeol so it can help warming the taller up. “Convenience store ramen is nice. I havent tried ramen with whip cream.”

 

“you’ve been missing a lot, Baekhyun.”

 

“I know! So are you in?”

 

 

“Depends. Your treat?”

 

“Yep. We can go after you eat you meal.”

 

Chanyeol blinks at him. “I’m not the only one who’ll eat, alright? The extra meal is for you –“

 

Astonished, Baekhyun shakes his head. “Wait – I can’t take a meal just like that – it’s for the staff and for the people who performed! I’m not even counted as a participant in this event and -”

 

“I want you to eat with me.” Chanyeol cuts him, putting a meal box infront of him. “The two meals are my bribe for my sudden participation in this event.”

 

“Sudden participation?”

 

“Cutting the long story short. I was dragged, forced to perform but then got bribed by two meal boxes and bus fare. So fun, right? And it wasn’t because I’m too greedy, alright? I’m expecting you to come tonight.“

 

Baekhyun cant help but to smile, his cheeks hurting “- eat everything. You’re very thin. If a stray dog would spot you, it might mistake you for a bone.”

 

The shorter frowns but nevertheless started eating the meal in front of him. They fell quiet again, as usual but it wasn’t burdening. It was an enjoyable silence especially when their shoulders are touching like it was the most normal thing between them. Chanyeol kept on putting meat on his box because he noticed that Baekhyun’s not eating the vegetables. “Eat well.” The taller would say and Baekhyun would nod, taking everything Chanyeol would give him. In return, Chanyeol would eat the vegetables set aside in his box.

 

“Food should not be put to waste!”

 

It felt like they are something more than strangers now.

 

“So how’s my song?” Chanyeol asks as he opens the green tea drink for him and Baekhyun. He starts cleaning up too. “Did you like it?”

 

Baekhyun nods, drinking from the can like a child. “It’s beautiful and heartfelt. You must’ve had a very nice date before that it made you write about it?”

 

Chanyeol laughs a little, putting his elbow on the table so he can rest his cheek on his palm, having a better look the reddening boy beside him.

 

“It was all in my head.” Chanyeol whispered, making Baekhyun stare at him, confused. “I never dated normally. I dated few times but it’s all university cafeteria and apartment dates since I don’t like spending time and money outdoors.”

 

“A-apartment dates?”

 

Chanyeol’s still smiling, nodding. “You watch movies – the ripped ones from torrent, eat home cooked food because that’s cheeper and that’s it – apartment dates.”

 

“Oh.”

 

“Were you thinking of something else?” Chanyeol teases with a playful grin on his face, making Baekhyun beet red and squirm. It’s fun to tease Baekhyun because he’s really cute when he doesn’t know what to do. “You’re thinking of something else, right? Naughty Baekhyun!”

 

Baekhyun was loss for words because he knows what may happen with a boy and a girl alone in an apartment and he feels extremely shy (and a little bit jealous) for thinking that Chanyeol may or may not have done it – after all, Chanyeol’s a man. All men have urges. Chanyeol’s teasing made his face is hot and he’s too embarrassed to be angry and ask the taller to stop.

 

 

“I just imagined things that I’d like to do with a person if ever I’ll date someone again. That’s the real secret of the song.” Chanyeol said, stopping his teasing. He then noticed Baekhyun’s long hair almost poking his eyes. Out of impulse, Chanyeol reached for it and arranged it quietly, drowning in the raven haired’s bright small eyes.

 

_Do you want to go out with me?_ Chanyeol’s heart wanted to ask that but his brain is the one in command “Have you ever dated before Baekhyun?”

 

The both of them became aware of the sudden uncalled intimacy and shied away awkwardly, Chanyeol kept his hands to him but still wanting touch Baekhyun’s face,  wanting to know how soft he is. The raven haired shook his head, looking away so he can calm his heart.

 

“Never?” Chanyeol wanted to confirm Baekhyun’s answer. “Relationships? Like the romantic one?”

 

“Never had any.”

 

“What are you doing with your life then?

 

“Dating and getting into relationship is not the highlight of everyone’s life -“

 

“I didn’t say that.” Chanyeol says sternly. “What I mean is that you’re twenty-two. You should’ve had atleast one or two crushes before that you confessed too? And you’re undeniably beautiful so I could bet that a lot had confessed to you. I can’t believe you never dated?”

 

Baekhyun lost his tongue the moment chanyeol complimented him. He often gets that beautiful compliment from the elderliness – be it Sehun’s father, his parents, the kind old lady in the bread shop near their home or the old _ahjussi_ who owns lots of dogs in his yard which is actually a heaven for him. Kyungsoo’s compliment can’t be considered one because of the usual a follow up ‘ _if you keep your mouth shut’._

Baekhyun has high regards when it comes to dating. He thinks that dating is for two people who likes each other sincerely and it’s not a game you’d join for fun and quit when you feel like quitting.

He also doesn’t have a big circle of friends so liking someone was impossible for him.

 

 

Until Chanyeol came. Or maybe it was the other way around because he was the one who found the red haired man.

 

Now that Baekhyun realized, Chanyeol was the first person who had made him feel so giggly just by thinking about him. Chanyeol makes his heart skip a beat, would make him tongue tied and would make his cheeks hurt from smiling too much. Make his heart in pain intolerably when he’s being too comfortable with other people.

 

 

Then he realized. _I must be really in love with him._

 

“I’m lame.” Baekhyun breathed heavily, forcing himself to smile. “You know, right? That I only have few people around me. That’s one reason why I never had any of what you’re curious of. It’s been family and neighbors for me. But I know and think of it, you know… dating someone. Getting in a relationship with someone that I really really _really_ like. It feels bittersweet that I wish to experience what a normal date is but I don’t have any chances to grab on. How can I even have a normal date when I’m not normal myself. I’m -” _No. Baekhyun. Stop saying too much._ “I’m a chicken – I’m scared for my heart to be broken by the person that I like.  I want our feelings to be mutual because I know myself I’d give everything to the person I like. ”

 

Baekhyun needs to be protected. That’s one thing Chanyeol learned that night. Baekhyun needs to be protected by people like him – though he’d like to give it a try between the both of them, this is Baekhyun’s first they’re talking about. No matter how much Chanyeol wanted them to date, their meeting be a tradition, he’s sure that at the moment, he can’t take responsibility of Baekhyun’s feelings.

 

It’s very obvious that Baekhyun likes him. Any man would see that especially when it’s Baekhyun’s eyes that were doing the talking and he likes Baekhyun too but it’s not enough and strong, for now. He feels light and safe and comfortable around him but it’s not enough. Chanyeol still fucks up and he doesn’t want to hurt such precious being like Baekhyun. He deserves all the good things in this world for his simplicity and sincerity.”

 

“I hope you’ll find someone who will give you beautiful memories, Baekhyun.” _I want it to be me._

 

Baekhyun nods at him, swallowing what he really wanted to say. _I want it to be you._ “Yeah. I hope for it, too.”

 

 

Too immersed in getting awkward again after a serious exchange of thoughts that had ended their conversation, Baekhyun thanked Jongdae’s sudden arrival on Chanyeol’s side. “Yeol! Can you wait for me for thirty minutes more? We still have to clean up the mess.”

 

“Yeah.” Chanyeol straightens himself up, looking at Baekhyun. “Is your treat still up? We could just get something sweet instead since we just ate a heavy meal.”

 

“Hey, Park Chanyeol – you’re really making this small guy treat you?” Jongdae playfully butted in making Baekhyun fire him a shy smile. “You’re really Mr. Krabs of the second district! And you get angry for that Sehun guy when he calls you that –“

 

 

 

“Se-second district?” Baekhyun whispered, finally lifting his head to make an eye contact with Jongdae who was caught in daze upon getting a chance to look at him clearly. Chanyeol knows his neighbor was captivated with his mouth hung open and it’s very understandable.

But the red haired knows it’s not the right time to get all distracted by Baekhyun’s beauty.  Baekhyun looks at him, confused as to why Jongdae said second district.

 

“Yeah. Second district. We both live in second district.” Jongdae adds casually. “Our neighborhood is nice, maybe you could visit us next time –“

 

“I feel like getting my ice cream now.” Chanyeol cuts Jongdae off, pulling Baekhyun in the arm. “I’ll see you after thirty minutes.”

 

Jongdae was about to ask what’s gotten into chanyeol but the tall red haired man was already pulling Baekhyun away, his face burning because Baekhyun knows now that he lied about where he lives.

 

He doesn’t know how to explain why he lied. Baekhyun might even think badly of him. Little did he know, the smaller man getting dragged by him was smiling to himself, looking at his small hand being held by a bigger and cold hand.

 

It wasn’t hand to wrist unlike earlier. It’s palm against palm.

 

Baekhyun knows he should be a little bit mad because he’s been lied to – but really, how can you be mad to a flustered Park Chanyeol? And the fact that he’s very nice to him, walking him home last night even though his house is too far from his is very heart melting. Baekhyun believes that Chanyeol is really a nice guy and what he did last night makes his heart happy.

 

And hopeful about something he shouldn’t hope for.

 

“Jongdae talks too much.” Chanyeol mumbled, stopping on his tracks, his hold on Baekhyun’s hand tightening. Baekhyun looked around and realized that they’ve reached a convenient store already. “He really talks too much and –“

 

“I – I need to go home, Chanyeol.” Baekhyun says all of a sudden, removing his hand from Chanyeol’s grasp. The taller quickly turned around, alarmed with Baekhyun’s sudden decision.

 

“Wait – right now?” Chanyeol asked, searching Baekhyun’s eyes but the raven haired had his head bowed down.

 

“I – I – I” Baekhyun’s mind can’t think of a proper excuse to get away. He has to leave before his mind start to think that chanyeol feels something for him – something similar to what he feels and his heart is aching because he knows, it’s not that same. “forgot that I have an early class with Kyungsoo.”

 

“Then let me take you home.”

 

“No!” Baekhyun shrieks, making Chanyeol understand that the latter must need some time away from him. Probably forever but Chanyeol hopes it’s doesn’t reach to that extent. Baekhyun felt guilty by shouting at Chanyeol but he doesn’t know how to look at the taller anymore.

 

One look with those big brown and caring eyes and he’ll think about dreamy possibilities of Chanyeol liking him.

 

“Then I’ll take you to the bus stop.” Chanyeol sighed, turning away to start walking. Baekhyun quietly followed and in no time, they reached their destination quickly. They both hated the silence but none of them dared to speak their hearts out. Chanyeol doesn’t know how to explain things about his lie to Baekhyun. Baekhyun doesn’t know how to rewind everything back to the moment where he shouted _no_  to Chanyeol’s face.

 

The scheduled bus arrived and when Baekhyun was about to open his mouth to apologize for what he did – he sees Chanyeol removing the scarf on his neck, silently handing it to him. “It’s cold. Take it.”

 

_No. Please. Don’t do this, Chanyeol. Don’t give it back yet._

 

“Thank you for coming tonight.” _Stop sounding like you’re saying goodbye to me, please Chanyeol._ “You should get in.”

 

Baekhyun feet really felt heavy but the bus is already waiting for him. He gave a one last look to Chanyeol as he climbs up, hoping he was watching him but the taller has his back already turned, walking away with both of his hands in his pockets. That’s when a tear unconsciously fell from his face.

 

He’s scared of what he’s feeling for Chanyeol but he’s a lot more scared by the thought the meeting tonight could be the last for them.

 

 

 


	3. Chapter 3

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> they say drunk people are the most honest ones.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> i am so sorry i dont really care about grammar lapses :( sorry if it irks u in anyway

 

****

Continuous lazy tapping of the pen, endless sighing, lifeless and out-of-focus student had never been so irritating for a tutor like Kyungsoo especially if this became a normal feat of his day for almost a week. Yes. He’s been in this kind of work for almost five years and that’s a long time to get accustomed of different kinds of students and surely, he got a lot of patience in his system but not on a certain student.

 

The instructor eyes his student, suspiciously. Byun Baekhyun was seated on their carpeted floor of their living room, working on his compositions with his cute bunny pen given by their overly friendly neighbor while he’s seated on the couch, facing the Byun’s enormous entertainment set. Sometimes, Kyungsoo wanted to just slack off and watch a movie or two with Baekhyun because their TV can be like a mini cinema but he’s getting a good pay for his eight hour classes every week days with the younger so he shrugs off that want. The Byuns are very good to him, he can’t take advantage of that.

 

They’ve been together for hours and the younger had only given him dots instead of notes. To be honest, he’s more of worried than irritated.

 

The thirty year old instructor had grown a deep bond with Baekhyun – there’s no denying to that because most of the time, his eight hours turns to nine and sometimes ten because Mrs. Byun is a good cook and he can never say no to her invitation for dinner. He immediately softened up to the younger in just a mere week and it was a good thing because studying all day, face to face with different books is boring. They manage to slip in chit-chats about non-academic things, Baekhyun being curious about the world and Kyungsoo getting hyped up explaining and answering his questions. The raven haired never run out of things to ask but it was all simple things.

 

_This boy is a special case, Kyungsoo. There’s a reason why he’s being homeschooled._

 

That’s what Kyungsoo remembered when he was summoned by his boss – the chairman of the university to be exact. Kyungsoo was supposed to be teaching in Seoul University but he was referred by a dean to home-school a certain twenty two year old guy who happened to be the dean’s nephew. At first, it was really weird hearing at such age, someone is being home-schooled. Surely, kids get home schooled. Less fun but one-on-one teaching technique is very efficient.

 

A twenty-two year old like the youngest of the Byun’s should be exploring the world like any normal grown up but he’s chained at home.

 

They said he’s sick and very weak. The best advice for him is to stay at home.

 

 

The doe eyed instructor’s interest with this student was piqued. And of course, who wouldn’t say no to a whooping salary every month? He immediately said yes, signed his contract and got the job.

 

He remembers his first day wasn’t as awkward as he imagined. Baekhyun’s as short as him but he’s beautiful and courteous. Very positive-natured. Baekhyun’s not that hard to befriend. Kyungsoo readied himself for a bratty student after knowing that the Byun’s can buy him with their riches but Baekhyun wasn’t – the Byun’s are the most humble, down to earth people Kyungsoo met his entire life and that’s no exaggerations – sometimes, he is a brat but overall, Baekhyun’s a good kid. He listens very well (talks very very very well, your eardrums will definitely hurt if you’ll exchange places with Kyungsoo) and always looking forward in learning may it be things for his chosen major or things about something else.

 

That’s why when Baekhyun started acting all disinterested, less enthusiastic and extremely quiet (mind you, Baekhyun talks 24/7, that’s for real), his mind drifting to somewhere else for almost a week now, Kyungsoo was really bothered. Usually, if something troubles Baekhyun, he would talk it out to him. Even the simplest things are consulted to him but the younger stayed tight lipped.

 

_One more tap of that goddamn pen and I swear to god, Byun Baekhyun, you’re going to be forced to tell me what’s bothering you._ Kyungsoo warned at the back of his mind as he continued to watch Baekhyun pout, writing aimlessly on his paper. He sees Baekbom making some sort of a yucky looking meal again inside the kitchen. The older of the Byun’s rowdy guy, experimental and troublesome and very doting older brother. Their eyes met and exchanged worried looks.

 

“Talk to him.” Baekbom mouthed, encouraging Kyungsoo to ask the raven haired boy why is he so down the past days. He was about to retort why should he be the one to ask but he remembered how Baekhyun got angry at his older brother for eating his green tea ice cream yesterday.

He got no choice.

 

“Baekhyun-ah?”

 

“Hmm?”

 

“You need to speak up or else I’ll ban that Se-guy from staying over during our classes.” Kyungsoo announces, sounding as if he has the authority of the Byun’s house and it worked. Baekhyun straightens his slumping shoulder, wide eyed as if someone poured a bucket of cold water on him. “You hear me. Speak up.”

 

“But – we’re ha-having classes?” Baekhyun stuttered, gathering all his books and started his fake reading “-studies always comes first,t hat’s how you roll.”

 

“How can you even study if you’re book is turned up-side down? Quit it, will you and start talking. We barely made a progress in your composition. The due is next week and you strictly have to follow that you nut! Even if you’re home-schooled! Everyone’s cramming for it and you’re here, busily making dotted craps.” Kyungsoo starts, motherly nagging mode that made Baekhyun put down his book. “you’re not even doing with English and your mind is obviously and undeniably somewhere god knows. Something happened, I know.”

 

“Nothing –‘

 

Kyungsoo’s losing it, he had to give off a big sigh and pinch the bridge of his nose. “Baekhyun. I’ve known you for five months, everyday; seeing and spending time with you a lot more than my own family made me understand you. I know you by heart and I know you fidget your fingers when you lie –“

 

“Am not!”

 

“You don’t lie to me, Baekhyun. You’re doing it right now even if you have your hands hidden under the table.” Kyungsoo says softly, sitting down beside the frowning boy. “Something needs to be sorted out. What’s eating you? Have you seen yourself? It’s not you, Baekhyun. It’s like some soul has taken over your body and god, this may sound cheesy but I am worried.”

 

“I’m worried too, you know.” Baekbom butts in, occupying a space on the couch with a bowl on his hand. The both didn’t tried to get curious about what’s he’s eating. “You’re like a zombie, bunny.”

 

“I’m still mad at you for eating my ice cream. Don’t talk to me, hyung.” Baekhyun answers back, huffing childishly. Kyungsoo rolled his eyes at Baekhyun and back to the younger who had his face planted on the wooden center table.

 

“Baek, that idiot is still your brother and no matter how many times he steals your food, you can never take the right from him to be worried for you.” Baekbom frowns at him but Kyungsoo just gave an eye roll. “You can’t be like this.”

 

“You know, if it will cheer you up, I’ll drive you to Myeongdong and give you cash so you can play really well again.” Baekbom speaks again, scooping a spoonful of his food. “I think you’re being so gloomy after you stopped going out like the usual.”

 

“I don’t want to go to Myeongdong anymore.” Baekhyun cries, knocking off some ideas to Kyungsoo. Getting the hint, Kyungsoo knows Baekhyun would never spill his problem out with his brother around. Baekbom is dumb and overprotective. Once he learned why Baekhyun’s having the emo phase of his life, he’ll definitely lose his sanity.

 

The truth is Baekbom doesn’t appreciate the thought of his baby _bunny_ being taken away from him, which is totally happening already – for two months.

 

“That looks delish.” Kyungsoo says as he looks at Baekbom’s food. He’s trying to send Baekbom away in the most natural way. “care to give me a bowl or something? My stomach is up for some daredevil looking food.”

 

“it’s freaking nice, Soo.” The older of the Byun brother’s eyes shined for he likes it when people takes interest on the foods he makes. “I’ll make you one. How ‘bout you baby bro? You’ll definitely cheer up once you tasted my food.”

 

“I made it clear that I’m not eating that toxic.” Baekhyun lifted his head, scrunching his nose. “And I’m mad at you!”

 

“Fine fine. You’re mad at me.” Baekbom stood up, making his way to the kitchen, finally leaving. “But you still have to know that hyung loves you alright?! Even though you’re being mean to me just because I ate your yummy looking ice cream!” he shouts, not giving up and it made Baekhyun groan. “your matcha ice cream had seduced me!”

 

When the instructor knows baekbom’s too engrossed with whatever hellish food he’s doing, he wasted no time in making Baekhyun talk. “It’s that musician, right, Baek?”

 

The raven haired sighed. “I’m inlove with him, Kyungsoo. _I’m so inlove with him._ ”

 

“Yeah. That’s like a given fact since you don’t stop talking about him for two months.” Kyungsoo retorts, making Baekhyun lift his head.  “Did you know something about him that made you brood like this? Is he seeing someone else? Is he something you hate?”

 

“No. He’s everything I want, Kyungsoo.” Baekhyun pouted, eyes tearing. “He’s very kind and nice like what I’ve expected from him and I want him to be in love with me too.”

 

“Hey, hey, you crybaby bunny.” Kyungsoo cups Baekhyun’s face. “Why are you crying and pouting huh?”

 

“Because I don’t have any reason now to talk to him! I don’t even have any reason now to see him! I was the one who pushed him away because I’m scared. I’m scared of him not liking me back, Soo. I’m really scared of myself for hoping too much.”

 

“The last time you met with him – what happened?”

 

And so Baekhyun told Kyungsoo everything. From the jealousy he felt when people are near Chanyeol to their getting to know talks to Chanyeol’s extreme kindness to him to the point that it’s making him think that the red haired musician feels something for him too to the way he pushed Chanyeol away. Kyungsoo faithfully listened, quiet and understanding what’s happening.

 

“I didn’t mean to shout at him and make him feel bad about lying to me.” Baekhyun mumbles. “It just made me hopeful and it really scared me.”

 

“Wait –“ Kyungsoo’s mind suddenly worked. “You know, Baekhyun… if the musician is not interested with you even for a tiny bit of interest, why would he insist on accompanying you home? Why would he expect you to come for him and even ask for a meal for you? Fifth district is too far from the second district, Baek! No one in the right mind would accompany someone he just met to somewhere far. Even if a friend asked him. He’s too kind.”

 

“But Sehun asked him to accompany home –“

 

“And then the second time? No one asked him right? That’s self initiative already, Baek. He wants to spend time with you – and the lying about his real home? My ex-boyfriend did that to me once because he doesn’t have the nerve to tell me the truth that he wanted to walk me home! Some guys are just abnormally shy – ”

 

“But he – he gave back the scarf!” Baekhyun cries, remembering Chanyeol’s soulless expression. It looks like Chanyeol is saying goodbye to him for real.

 

“Then maybe you should stop using the scarf as an excuse to meet him. You cant use that forever. Him giving back the scarf doesn’t mean that he doesn’t want to meet with you anymore.” The instructor carefully explained, giving light to Baekhyun’s brooding. “you wouldn’t know how he truly feels if you wont see him again and talk to him, right? He might be happy if you’ll show up.”

 

“He doesn’t like me.”

 

“I’m sure he likes you. Who wouldn’t like this whiny cutie? Hmm? Only someone stupid would not like you, Baekhyun.”

 

“I’m really scared.”

 

“He might be as scared as you, baek.” Kyungsoo tells him, patting the younger on his head. “I suggest you go and meet him, tonight.”

 

“But we didn’t parted well the last time –“

 

“Quit making excuses because you’re scared! Everything you’re feeling is natural.” Kyungsoo reminds him, holding his hand tightly. “Meet him tonight. Don’t jump into your own conclusions and ask him why he’s being kind to you.”

 

Baekhyun thought hard but then it was cut off by their doorbell ringing crazily. Kyungsoo stood up, frowning deeply. “I swear to god, that neighbor of yours needs to be reminded to just ring the doorbell twice!”

 

The raven haired just giggled, watching Kyungsoo grumpily went to open the door for Sehun. He’s just in time for lunch, as always. When Kyungsoo was back, Sehun was trailing at him, rubbing his left ear. “Hey Baek!”

 

“Hi Hoon – what’s wrong?”

 

“Kyungsoo twisted my ear!” Sehun whined and Kyungsoo just gave him a cold shoulder. Baekhyun noticed that Sehun’s holding a plastic bag that appears to be something from their restaurant. “Thank you so much for that treatment.”

 

“Stop ringing the doorbell like some murderer’s after you, that’s all I’m asking.” Kyungsoo scolds, sitting down as he clears the low table where Baekhyun’s stuff are scattered messily. “And stop hanging out with Baekhyun during classes. You’re a distraction.”

 

“Distraction to Baekhyun or to you?”

 

Instead of getting an answer, Sehun received a book getting thrown at his face harshly and a blushing Kyungsoo.. He was about to whine but he heard Baekhyun laughing at the both of them.

 

_That’ a progress_. Sehun thought. For a week, he has been seeing Baekhyun brood all day. _Chanyeol_ will be at ease once he knew that Baekhyun feeling well already.

 

“Oh. Sehunnie’s here!” Baekbom appears with his already finished meal. He placed the bowl down and it made the three look at it very carefully. It smells weird and it scared Kyungsoo. “Hey, is that food you brought?”

 

Sehun nods, looking at Baekhyun. “My dad made a special beef soup for Baekhyun since he knew that Baekkie’s not feeling well.”

 

“That’s very nice of Mr. Oh.” Baekhyun mumbled, getting curious with what’s inside the plastic with Sehun. “Ahh! Veggies!”

 

“Something Baekhyun doesn’t like!” Baekbom adds. “Byun Baekhyun, someone prepared that for you so you have to eat very well.”

 

“But veggies!”

 

“Mr. Oh’s food or your stupid bro’s deadly one?” Kyungsoo asks and Baekhyun immediately answered by getting the food container from the plastic, making Sehun laugh, Baekbom pout and Kyungsoo smile with satisfaction.

 

The four of them ate together around the small table in the living room, not in peace because Baekbom tries to make them eat his food but the three of them refused, saying that they’re too young to die from food poison. Sehun kept on making a mess and of course, the person who has the motherly nature didn’t let him off easily.

 

The smile on Baekhyun’s face, however is a good thing for them to see. Sehun’s not aware how Baekhyun came back to his old happy and Baekbom’s too occupied getting all sad because in the end, he was the one who ate his own dish. Wanting a time away to give a private call to Chanyeol, Sehun was the one who claimed the cleaning up duty. When Baekhyun and Kyungsoo came back to studying and Baekbom went back to his room to mope but they all know he’s just going to play something.

 

While Kyungsoo and Baekhyun started studying again, Sehun went inside the Byun’s kitchen and dialed Chanyeol’s number. There was a reason why he keeps on visiting Baekhyun for a week now. Chanyeol showed up to him one night, asking if Baekhyun showed up in their ramen place, worry plastered on his face. Baekhyun hasn’t been showing up to chanyeol after that night when they sort of had a misunderstanding and his tall friend is going crazy already.

 

“I always search for him in the crowd. Always waiting for him to appear right infront of me after I pack up but man, it makes me crazy when he doesn’t.” Chanyeol confesses, frustrated of not seeing Baekhyun for days. “I shouldn’t have lied to him about living near the fifth district.”

“What do you want to do then?” was all that Sehun replied to his problematic friend. “I could give you his contact and apologize to him.”

 

‘Dude, you know I can’t just send him a text message!”

 

“Why the hell not?”

 

“Because he likes me! It’s like I’m taking advantage of it.”

 

“obviously you like him back so what’s _taking advantage_ are you talking about?” Sehun says frankly, making Chanyeol speechless. “Chanyeol, this is it. Most of the time, when your past flings stops contacting you, you just let it go but here you are – nonstop worrying about Baekhyun. You are fond of him too so why not ask him out?”

 

“Ask him out and let him hate me once he figured out what kind of douche I am? Sehun – this is Baekhyun we’re talking about. I can’t give him a complicated first experiences.”

 

“Then maybe try being a man for once and make everything beautiful and everything worth to remember for him, Chanyeol.”

 

Sehun was no love expert – heck, he’s been single for years because he really doesn’t know how to date but Chanyeol and Baekhyun is different case – they like each other yet too afraid for it. What he said made Chanyeol really quiet but it’s an indication that he’s starting to put senses to his red haired friend being so lovesick and scared. He had changed into someone aware and cautious to other’s feelings. He’s a very likeable man and Sehun sees that he doesn’t have bad intentions for Baekhyun. The idiot treats Baekhyun like a gem, something lovely, precious and one of a kind.

 

Maybe the bad intentions would come once they become boyfriends because he knows Chanyeol can never keep his hands to himself especially to someone as cute and adorable as Baekhyun but at the moment, Chanyeol looks like he’s not thinking anything beyond the innocent line.

 

He’s actually being careful from what he observed. Putting foolish restrictions to himself.

 

“Chanyeol.” He calls, putting a hand on Chanyeol’s shoulder. “Baekhyun is a wonderful person and anyone who gets to see that can be a potential rival for you. Are you okay with the thought of him going out with someone else?”

 

“No.” then Chanyeol’s eyes widened in fright “-what if he’s seeing someone else now?”

 

“What do you take Baekhyun for? An easy man?” Sehun was so not believing what got inside Chanyeol’s bird brain. “Baekhyun not the type of guy who’d jump from one guy to another  in just a span of three days you stupid stupid stupid man!”

 

Chanyeol just groaned and buried his face back on the table. “I’m going crazy! I need to be saved!”

 

“Why not follow my advice and freaking establish your relationship with him – you wouldn’t be saved if you keep on stopping yourself, thinking that it would turn badly! You haven’t tried yet! And honestly, I doubt that Baekhyun has gotten over you? He’s into weird and impossible things. The more troublesome, the more it attracts him. I’m telling you, he never gives up so easily without giving a fight.”

 

Sehun remembers how Chanyeol stopped frustrating himself upon realizing that he categorized the musician as  someone _weird, impossible and troublesome._ The red haired need not to ask again for clarifications – he knows himself that he is what Sehun described him to be. “I still don’t know what to do and I have an exam to deal with tomorrow but all I can think of is Baekhyun – this is crazy.”

 

“You know, I have a bottle of soju. Let’s drink then you go home, take some warm bath to calm your nerves and study.”

 

“I don’t have money for soju –“

 

“Chanyeol, it’s free. See how generous I am?” Sehun grins, making Chanyeol laugh a little.

 

“Where are you getting this supply of soju?“

 

“None of your business, man. Anyways. I’ll do you a favor and check on him tomorrow. I’ll tell you if it’s a good timing to send a message for him –“

 

“What? I won’t text him!”

 

“Oh you will.” Sehun cleared. “you will stop being a chicken and resolve whatever misunderstanding the both of you have and ask him out for real. I cant have you dumping all your love problems to me every damn night.”

 

 

Sehun had given Baekhyun’s number but the red head chicken never sent a text. Once Chanyeol decides on something, there’s no changing in that. That’s a fact Sehun knows about his hard headed friend but he never stopped dropping by in their ramen place to hear news about Baekhyun. Chanyeol would always reply in a speed of light, asking for stolen photos and when he learned that Baekhyun’s sick. Chanyeol had sent Baekhyun some healthy matcha ice cream through Sehun but it’s a waste because Baekbom ate it in one go, leaving nothing for the raven haired.

 

His call to his musician friend was diverted into a voice message after series of rings and that made Sehun decide that he’ll just send Chanyeol a message.

 

**TO: PCY**

BBH is fine today. Actually, I think he’s back to his old self. Still angry about his matcha incident but he’s fine. He’s studying rn!

 

Sehun was about to snap a photo of person he’s spying but he was surprised when Kyungsoo’s face registered onto his screen.

_“What the hell are you doing?”_ the small instructor interrogates, snatching Sehun’s phone from his possession. The cook just let Kyungsoo scroll in his conversation thread with Chanyeol because he can never talk back to him.

 

He’s too cute. That’s why.

 

“BBH is Baekhyun – no doubt. Why are you updating this PCY about what Baekhyun’s been doing for the past week – I like how you smell but stop invading my personal space.” Kyungsoo warned him, whispering so that Baekhyun wouldn’t be distracted. The smaller’s free hand stayed on Sehun’s chest, stopping the taller’s advancing step towards him. “Baekhyun might see us, stop –“

 

“it’s been a week now and you’re still denying my effect on you? I distract you a lot right? That’s why you hate me around?”

 

Kyungsoo glared at Sehun and pulled the taller further inside the kitchen. What he said was true – who wouldn’t be distracted with someone like Sehun? He’s boyfriend material and flirty and no one had ever flirted with the instructor like that for years now. Of course, he’d be distracted. Years had passed and Kyungsoo’s well aware he’s professionalism is intact. His previous students tried their way on him but he hardly gave them the chance. Oh Sehun is a different case. He’s not a student and he’s definitely his type – only that he is younger and that’s not very ideal to the professor. “you’re doing well in distracting me but your distracting tactics will not work right now. Answer my question. Who is PCY?”

 

“Has Baekhyun mentioned someone named Park Chanyeol to you?”

 

Kyungsoo bites on his lower lip because he’s very bad with names. He remembers when he’s still an instructor of a class, he can use his both hands to count the names he recalled. Most of it are troublesome and pain in the ass students who thinks lightly of him just because he’s shorter than them. _Park Chanyeol…_

 

Sehun who was standing in front of the older instructor used the opportunity of making Kyungsoo lost in his thoughts to cornering the older on the sink. Both his hands and legs are trapping the instructor. “Ah! The musician!”

 

Sehun ducks to give the older a quick kiss, making Kyungsoo redder than red and mute. It’s been days since he gave a sudden confession to the older but all he got was a _go to hell_ and a kick in the shin but Kyungsoo’s very easy to read. After his confession of liking the big eyed instructor, stolen glances happened and that makes everything complicated between them. Kyungsoo would always glare at him when he’s caught and the attention Sehun’s getting when he tries to irritate the instructor is very amusing. “Congrats. You know my friend.”

 

“wha- why PCY… do … Baekhyun – God!” Kyungsoo whisper-shouted his frustrations out, trying to hide his blushing face by the back of his hand. “What the fuck – I’m too old for this!”

 

“the kissing? We can do so much more, Kyungsoo only if you’ll beg me but I’m an easy man to say yes –“ Sehun felt like he would throw up when Kyungsoo gave his stomach a jab.  “That hurts!”

 

“I meant the stuttering you idiot!” Kyungsoo tries to escape the younger’s pinning but Sehun’s built speaks so much about his strength. “Let go.”

 

“How about we put it this way.” The younger smirked, making the scary instructor shiver. “One answer one kiss –“

 

“This is harassment –“

 

“You’re kneeing my crotch, Kyungsoo. That’s harassment.”

 

“Fine!” the doe eyed instructor concedes, his hands fisted at the hem of the younger’s clothes. “You kissed me already. Now answer me.”

 

“Chanyeol is going crazy because Baekhyun stopped meeting him. They sort of had this misunderstanding and my chicken friend is having his issues.”

 

“Baekhyun has his issues too.” Kyungsoo’s voice somehow softened, peeking up the  younger. “Chanyeol likes Baekhyun, right?”

 

Before answering, Sehun gave Kyungsoo’s cheek a kiss. “Yes. He likes Baekhyun.”

 

“He should just ask him out. It’s so frustrating to watch them dread over nothing!”

 

“I know.” Sehun rested his head the older’s shoulders, sighing on his neck that made him flinch. “But they’re almost there. I know Chanyeol – once he knew he can talk to Baekhyun again, he’ll make everything right and back in place.”

 

“Is – he a good man?”

 

“Yes.” Sehun connects his lips to the older’s soft ones and felt smiling when Kyungsoo opened his mouth slightly so he can lock their lips more. _Chanyeol can be a dick but he’s sure his friend will never be one to Byun Baekhyun._

 

 

****

 

Baekbom tried to stop him from going out that night because he looked so tired after a whole day of doing his composition that was due the next week, Monday. Apparently, his small talk with Kyungsoo made him go back to himself and managed to get an inspiration for song lyrics. It was the easy part of song composition for him since he had always been good with words. He stopped midway when Kyungsoo told him that their classes were done for the day and notified Baekhyun that he can drop by tomorrow and help him improve it --  Kyungsoo’s strict but behind it was a softy especially for him that he cannot leave Baekhyun alone to dread all by himself.

Tomorrow is a Saturday and Kyungsoo chose to save his cramming ass instead of resting or meeting his friends. Baekhyun declined the offer and said that he can work on it on his own but Kyungsoo threatened him of siding Baekbom if the younger would accept the offer.

 

That leaves him no choice but to accept Kyungsoo’s help in exchange of making his older brother say nothing about his decision of going out.

 

“Come on, Baekbom-ah. Baekhyun never went out for a week. Cut him some slack…” Kyungsoo persuaded the elder of the Byun siblings while he helps Baekhyun arrange his things.

 

“but look at my bunny baby – he looks tired! His eyes are drooping!”

 

“If you stop him, he might not have the heart to forgive you in eating his food.” That’s the last thing that his brain thought of in making the older brother let Baekhyun enjoy a night out and apparently, it moved the elder, giving one last look to Baekhyun who was looking so hopeful for his yes. “Look at that baby. Come on. Let him go.”

 

“Fine fine. Baekhyun can go.” Baekbom sighed. “But he has to go home before his usual curfew of three am. If he won’t, I’m telling mom and dad.”

 

Right.

 

His parents are totally against him going out every night  but Baekbom helps him get away with it. It’s not a secret but he never has been lectured by it mainly because his parents dote on him but once they’ve had enough of something, that’s when the trouble comes in for him. He doesn’t want to grounded.

 

 

 

Myeongdong was filled with people, as usual. The night is still cold but bearable that Baekhyun didn’t even had the need of bringing the scarf he used to knot around his neck. _No._ Kyungsoo had stopped him from bringing anything but himself, his bus pass and phone so that he won’t have any instruments anymore for excuses in meeting Chanyeol again. _You have to clear up what’s between the two of you. If you’re friends, then work your way in making that something more._ Kyungsoo reminded him, giving him an encouraging tap.

 

He had lots of doubts but Kyungsoo was right – he was never wrong for any matter – he had the courage in walking up to Chanyeol to finally talk to him. Surely, he can have that courage again after not getting in contact with him for a week. He still doesn’t know how he’ll react once he sees Chanyeol again but the desire to talk to him again intensifies every minute, every turn his head does in searching for him through the crowd.

 

But to his big dismay, there wasn’t a one hundred eighty five centimeter tall man with dry red hair playing at the square. No beautiful acoustic music about ramen or an ideal first date.

 

Chanyeol’s not around and Baekhyun felt his heart break. He was looking forward in meeting the musician – he missed him so much and a big part of him didn’t want to give up. Baekhyun’s eyes –though blurry because of the hot tears wanting to fall down because of his disappointment continued to search for the red haired giant.

 

_If I wont see him tonight then I’ll give up._  Baekhyun swore to himself as he gets few bumps from rushing strangers.But then came _Please let me see him tonight._

 

He walked around for a moment, trying to search for every possible place where Chanyeol would stay but even if his feet can still manage to walk, his heart wears him down. Being emotionally pained made him fall to his knees on the cold hard pavement. He knows himself he didn’t want to give up on seeing Chanyeol yet the universe is slapping him that it’s already over between the both of them.

 

Baekhyun didn’t care if people passing him by gave weirded looks or if he received few curious and mocking comments as he silently cries to himself, hugging his knees tightly. Longing, sadness and disappointment mixing up inside him that Baekhyun didn’t noticed someone kneeling in front of him – until he heard that someone talking to him. Someone who’s tone was caring enough to make him feel better.

 

“Did you fell? Are you hurt?”

 

_Yes. I did fell for someone named Park Chanyeol and it hurts so much._ Baekhyun answered at the back of his mind as he continued to sob quietly, making the stranger in front of him help him stand up. Baekhyun dried the tears in his eyes using his sleeves before thanking the stranger but he was stopped – the stranger held both his wrist and the familiarity of those callous hands made the smaller look to the owner of it.

 

Baekhyun gasped. There stand in front of him – the man he longed to see. Still abnormally tall with a tuft of bright red hair, big eyes staring shocked at him and out of words. Baekhyun can feel Chanyeol’s grip on his wrist tightens as the giant musician takes a look at him clearly as if trying to make sure of something.

 

Park Chanyeol found him.

“Baekhyun.” The taller finally spoke, his hand that’s previously on the smaller’s wrist went up to cup Baekhyun’s face, thumb wiping the falling tears. Hearing Chanyeol’s deep voice calling his name made the smaller tear up – not because he’s disappointed and sad but because he’s happy. “Are you hurt somewhere? Why are you crying? Speak, Baekhyun.” The taller asked - concern and panic is evident on his face. Baekhyun took his time to look at Chanyeol instead of answering since the words don’t come out his mouth.

 

His guitar is strapped on his shoulder. He wears two layers of clothing but the tip of his nose and ears are flushed red because of the cold. “You’re cold.” Baekhyun mumbles, seeing chanyeol’s breathe ghosting out clearly. It smelt like soju – “Chanyeol.”

 

“Why are you crying in the middle of Myeongdong!” Chanyeol scolds, frown spreading across his face as he continues to tilt Baekhyun’s small face, checking if the smaller acquired anything painful. It made Baekhyun noticed their distance with each other - no distance at all but it made the smaller warm. He wanted them to stay as close as possible. “Tell me, are you hurt? God it’s freezing out here and you’re just wearing a sweater with nothing underneath? And you’re crying?! What the hell happened!? Speak now or I’ll go crazy!”

 

“I’m okay.” Baekhyun places his soft hand over Chanyeol’s and smiled. The taller sighed exasperatedly, his soju-induced breathe lingered on the smaller’s nose and it’s something he liked. “I’m sorry if I made you worried -”

 

It must be because of Baekhyun’s voice or the warmth of his hands or because of the amount of soju Chanyeol consumed that night or simply because of an agonizingly long week of not seeing each other that’s why Chanyeol lost his control and pulled the smaller into a suffocating embrace.

The moment he saw the smaller crying as he receives no help from the people passed him by made chanyeol feel the scare of his life – it was right to follow his instincts of dropping by Myeongdong before going home after a night of drinking with his block mates after completing their dreadful hell week filled with exams and performances. If he didn’t – who would be there to help Baekhyun? He felt his heart breaking upon the thought and hugging Baekhyun made it fade.

 

“I’m sorry.” Chanyeol whispered near the raven haired’s ear and his own breathing hitched when he felt Baekhyun hugging him back, burying his face onto his chest. “I didn’t meant to shout. – I was worried – Baekhyun I wanted to see again but I don’t want to see you in that state. I panicked. I’m sorry I scared you.”

 

 

 

 

 

Baekhyun feels exploding upon hearing Chanyeol feeling exactly the same as him for the past week.

_There stands_ Chanyeol, hugging him tightly felt surreal. Baekhyun had lots of question. The red haired musician was rumbling on his words and he sounds more sincerer and honest than before. He’s usually meek. He doesn’t speak a lot.

 

Chanyeol is drunk. It was evident with the way his breath smelled. He must be saying rubbish and things he didn’t actually mean since Baekhyun used to witness his older brother getting drunk. This touchy personality must be an aftermath of his alcohol intoxication. “You’re drunk, Chanyeol”

 

“Yeah … I mean… no… just slightly.”

Baekhyun hides his blushing face as he inhales Chanyeol’s scent when the taller tightened his hug to him – he smells like a mixture of cheap detergent and lemon. If it’s not being too much, Baekhyun wanted to stay close and hear Chanyeol’s heartbeat. It was as fast as his own.

 

Chanyeol, noticing that they’ve been earning attention from the people around broke their hug all of a sudden so they can look at each other, making Baekhyun’s heart speed up doubly and feel his face reddening.

 

“We need to talk.”

 

Baekhyun wasn’t given a chance to answer when Chanyeol removed his denim jacket off his body, leaving him with his black cotton hoody underneath. “Wear this first.” He said.

 

“But –“

 

“My eyes are big for a reason – I see you shivering.” The giant gave him a small smile, dimples on his left cheek showing then, the next thing Baekhyun knew, he’s being held by Chanyeol in the hand, dragging him out of the crowd to an almost empty park. There are few couples eating street foods that can help warm themselves up, not far from the benches where Chanyeol led him is a basketball court where few high school students still clad in uniforms play noisily, having fun with their silly ball game.

 

Chanyeol coughs his nervousness away as they sat down in one of the benches, away from people. It was quiet and the recollection of his acts made Chanyeol really nervous. The hug, the confession of missing the latter – the taller thinks he made a fool out of himself infront of Baekhyun.

 

“I’m sorry!” both of them managed to say at the same time and they swear to themselves that they melt at each other’s gaze. They were still holding each other’s hands until Baekhyun took his chance to speak his mind first before he backs out.

 

“I – I didn’t mean to – the last time – I was rude, chanyeol. I’m sorry.”

 

Chanyeol shook his head, inching closer to Baekhyun. “No. don’t apologize please. It’s not your fault.” When Baekhyun bowed his head, Chanyeol immediately cupped the smaller’s chin and tilted it up to check if he’s crying again. Baekhyun was about to spill a tear but his actions stopped it. “I – lied to you. It’s a natural reaction to be scared. To feel betrayed but I swear, I didn’t lied to you because I have bad motives. I was embarrassed with myself when I wanted to be with you a little bit more – that’s why I lied about having the same route as you. I didn’t know how to contact you again after you knew it was just a poor lie. I don’t even know what I want that time – I just -” Chanyeol breathes heavily upon seeing Baekhyun’s eyes not leaving him. “I just felt something with you. I’m not sure if it’s attraction – okay maybe it’s attraction Baekhyun. I don’t know but I liked being with you.”

 

 

“I wasn’t angry because you lied –“ Baekhyun whispered, happy to see relief on Chanyeol’s face when he said that. He breathes deeper, plucking some courage. If soju would make it easy for him to say what’s on his mind like how Chanyeol does, he’d gladly chug down a bottle or two. “I was scared, yes. But not of you, Chanyeol. You are kind to me and I never felt you have bad intentions – you’re a gentle person. When I knew you made excuses when you accompanied me home, I felt that tinge of hope that – that – that –“

 

_You like me. Just a little bit of like would push me off the cliff filled with hopes that you feel the same way._

 

 

Baekhyun felt a lump on his throat that stops him from saying it out loud. He’s frightened of Chanyeol’s reaction when he knew that he’s being too hopeful of something so impossible.

Park Chanyeol liking him? It’s a dream.

 

“I’m in love with you!” Baekhyun cries, closing his eyes because he’s not ready to see Chanyeol’s reaction with his confession. “I’m so inlove with you that it scares me because I hope you feel the same way! It’s true. I have been watching you for some quite time now and I was happy you didn’t thought I’m a creep. I don’t know what to do the moment I wanted you to feel the same way aboutme Chanyeol. That’s the truth. I tried to run away from you because I don’t want to be hurt by you but the truth is – I am the one hurting myself. Distancing away from you hurts me. Not seeing you hurts me. Thinking about you hurts me but I cant stop being inlove with you –“

 

“I’m not inlove with you.”

 

Baekhyun’s mind stopped processing and he can only feel his heart breaking into pieces. His tears wont stop falling. “I – I’m sorry I should just go and you can forget everything I said –“

 

“Stop running away from me.” Baekhyun was stopped from mumbling and trying to escape Chanyeol’s hold when he was pulled again by the taller for an embrace. “Listen to everything I’ll say Baekhyun.”

 

Baekhyun wondered as to why Chanyeol’s still comforting him, making him feel loved with his embraces. The arms around his small frame felt suffocating yet nice. If only Chanyeol didn’t dropped the bomb onto Baekhyun then he might have enjoyed it.

 

“I’m not inlove with you.” Chanyeol repeats and Baekhyun feels like the shattered pieces of his heart were being stepped “But make me… Because I believe I’m almost there, Baekhyun.”

 

The raven haired pushed the taller away from him wondering if he heard him clearly. He looked into Chanyeol’s eyes and it must be crazy but Baekhyun can only feel the sincerity. The taller lifted his hand to wipe the tears under his eyes. “Please stay inlove with me for a little more while. I’m almost there, Baekhyun. I want to be inlove with you too.”

 

Chanyeol smiled “I know you like me – believe it or not I was scared of you.” Then there’s a snort, followed by Baekhyun’s cheek being squished by both of his hand that stopped the smaller from crying. “you’re spontaneous and cute and precious and you’re the only person who saw through my songs! The channel of my inner thoughts I can never voice out. But I’m so good at hurting people, Baekhyun. I’m unsure of what I’m feeling about you. And I’ve hurt a lot of people whenever I take commitments when I’m still unsure of it. Thinking about me hurting you is unbearable! I can’t imagine ruining your memorable firsts!”

 

“You knew – you knew that I like you?”

 

“It was just an intuition ... your eyes says a lot more than your mouth.” Chanyeol told him, liking the way Baekhyun’s nose gone red from crying too much. Chanyeol had smiled when Baekhyun sniffed hard and cutely. “Then it came from your own pretty mouth that you’re inlove with me tonight. I guess my intuitions were wrong but I think I like it. You being inlove with me and all. I tried to run away too, you know? I thought after that night you were in a hurry going home, I could go back like how I was before you haven’t walked into my life – like literally… you know when you gave me the scarf –  you really do look cute back then. You always look cute Baekhyun.”

 

Baekhyun bursts out a soft giggle, amused because a drunk Chanyeol is very talkative and cute – like a kid babbling all his thoughts in one go but ends up getting confused and mixed up. “I think we should talk when you’re sober, Chanyeol.” The smaller told him. What he needed to hear was said – they’re almost there, right where he pictures them to be. Only that Chanyeol’s just not there yet of being inlove with him but he’s almost there. Baekhyun understood that Chanyeol has his own issues too and he’s willing understand it all if Chanyeol. The smaller stood up and tried to pull Chanyeol to stand on his feet but the red haired giant refused. “You’re drunk. You should rest, Chanyeol. I’m taking you home. We can talk again tomorrow. Or the next day.”

 

“You should know – that drunk people are a lot more honest than the sober one.” Chanyeol pulled him down to sit again. “If I don’t tell this to you now, then I’m not sure when I’ll be able to tell you again.”

 

Biting his lip, Baekhyun stayed quiet, played his fingers to ease the uncertainty his feeling. Will Chanyeol forget everything he’ll say while he’s drunk? Will they go back to being chickens the next day?

 

“Running away from you  made me crazy – not seeing you for a week made me crazy. I want to see you but you’re not where I want you to be.  It’s like when I had my first concourse and my parents missed it – it was just sad and I couldn’t bear it.” Chanyeol, feeling a bit heavy rested his head on the shorter’s shoulder. “It it wasn’t for Sehun I swear, I would have failed my exams because all I can think of is you – your smile, your voice, your eyes, your giggles – “

 

“What does Sehun had to do with – wait – so all this time, Sehun’s watching me on your behalf?”

 

Chanyeol could only nod on Baekhyun’s neck as scooted closer that made the smaller hugged him tightly. Everything already made sense. Sehun’s sudden hanging out with him for the past week was because of Chanyeol. Unconsciously – tears came out flowing like a river from his eyes.

 

Baekhyun never felt so happy.

 

“I’m so inlove with you, Chanyeol.” he whispered and he can feel the giant smile. How can he not be in love with such man who feels the same way he does. Baekhyun’s love is not unrequited and he wanted to learn more about Chanyeol. He only knows few things about him but that enough can make him fall. All over and over again. It was such a nice feeling.

 

“You’re comfy, Baekhyun.” Chanyeol mumbled, his voice sounded so sleepy. “I like you.”

 

After hearing that, all Baekhyun can hear were snores and evenly breathing.

 

 

****

 

Chanyeol will never drink weird-named cocktails ever again if it would only give him horrendous and massive headache. It’s like his skull was getting drilled and hammered and it made him realized that he can only handle soju and not those fancy brandies and mixes. Why did he even asked for soju after chugging glasses of every concoction offered to him anyway? Not a bright move.

He just wanted to get away even just for a night so when Jongdae dragged him for an acquaintance party the first year music majors hosted, he didn’t had second thinking of coming. All his block mates came to celebrate being free from exams and free unlimited drinks? Isnt that a little bit too good for a broke independent college student like him who’s already dawned of falling in love with a sweet and innocent boy who deserve all the good in the world?

Definitely, he’s not a good.

For him, he isn’t.

It has been a week – Chanyeol wanted a break away from thinking about how long will his heart had to suffer from stopping himself from going to Baekhyun. He lived like a zombie getting alive when he receives messages from Sehun. Before Baekhyun, Chanyeol didn’t really liked it when Sehun sends him a message since it’s all shitty jokes and rants but after Baekhyun came and suddenly became distant to him, Sehun’s messages became his saving grace.

 

Days had passed and Chanyeol had to deal with denying how much the raven haired meant to him but distance makes the heart grow ponder. The giant realized that he had to clear his intentions to Baekhyun or else, he’d go crazy.  

 

What is his intentions? _Be honest with Baekhyun._

 

His head was pounding when he stirs awake - the first thing he noticed was his head felt comfortable on where it laid. He can hear someone humming – beautiful humming that somehow calms his headache. He shifted and slowly opened his eyes and felt at loss when the humming stopped.

 

“Hey, you’re awake.”

 

Chanyeol jolts up upon hearing that sweet voice owned by Baekhyun. He realized that the comforting place he’s laying at earlier was none other than Baekhyun’s lap. While his head ached, questions had formed inside him. _Where are they? What time is it? What happened before he passed out?_

The red haired wanted to cuss – he should remember everything that had happened while he was intoxicated with alcohol earlier. He didn’t want to ask Baekhyun because his gut feel tells him that he had already said something to the shorter. His face felt hot. _Did I confessed while I’m drunk? Really, Chanyeol? That’s stupid._

 

“Drink this.” Baekhyun cuts his deep thinking as he offered a cup of drink. “That’s warm water mixed with honey. Good in treating alcohol-induced headaches.”

 

Chanyeol didn’t said a word as he wondered how did Baekhyun managed to acquire a thermos filled with warm drink he definitely needed. He took the drink carefully while he scans the area they’re at. Park with no one but them, distinct vehicles whirring from the outside and nightlights slowly dwindling – they’re at Myeongdong, that’s the first answer to his question. He scanned the area and saw his guitar case on the table in front of them, few pieces of papers with music notes and lyrics scattered along with the pen he got for free when he and Jongdae did their groceries together to achieve the 10% discount when they reach a certain amount. That pen was his favorite – no matter how many times he dropped it, it wouldn’t blot and it’s so easy to use.

 

“How – how long was I asleep?” Chanyeol croaks, eyes landing on Baekhyun who placed his phone on the table – a piano app was on the screen.

 

“An hour and thirty minutes, I guess? It’s fifteen minutes before 2 am.”

 

Silence envelopes the both of them since Chanyeol didn’t know what to say after – he’s still thinking about the things he have said but he got bits of what he did after drinking what Baekhyun gave him.

 

They hugged – multiple of times after seeing each other again.

 

“Kyungsoo told me you may not remember everything you said to me so don’t push yourself too hard in remembering it. It’s okay.” Baekhyun told him gently, looking away as if he’s hurt because Chanyeol’s such jerk for forgetting. He gathers the papers into a stack to distract himself. “I borrowed your pen and papers by the way. I need to finish something -”

 

“Baekhyun.” Chanyeol stopped the raven haired from doing anything but just pay attention to him. “You’re inlove with me.”

 

Baekhyun’s face grew tomato red and he knew it that’s why he covered his face with the back of his hands. “It’s a lot embarrassing when you say it while you’re sobered up. but.. yes. I am”

 

“And I told you a lot of things too, right? I can’t remember the whole details but you know how I feel about you, right”

“You – do you really mean that?” Baekhyun peeks shyly and Chanyeol grins at him. “Stop smiling like that. You’re teasing me…”

 

“Show me your face. I want to see you.” Chanyeol says, holding Baekhyun hands down tightly. “Cute”

 

“Stop that –“ the smaller cries and tried to retrieve his hands back but Chanyeol didn’t let him – instead, the taller put it up to give each knuckle a soft kiss. “Chanyeol –“

 

“Let’s start dating, Baekhyun” Chanyeol breathes heavily, Baekhyun’s mouth remained ajar.

 

The smaller was trying to process what Chanyeol had asked him. “Da-date?”

 

“Yes.”Chanyeol  says with his sparkling eyes. There’s a glint of playfulness “Look – save me from getting crazy for wondering when can I see you.” The taller’s hand reached for Baekhyun’s cheek and pinched it, earning him a cute scrunching of nose. “Let’s try, Baekhyun. I’m not promising to be the best you can have but I promise to work hard not to be a headache. Let’s not be afraid anymore – I got you. Though somewhere along the way I swear I might make you cry but here’s one thing -”

 

Chanyeol had made up his mind. He wants Baekhyun to be a tradition for him. He’s afraid he can hurt the raven haired but there’s a big hole inside him that only Baekhyun can fill. His fears earlier were casted aside with just one look from the raven haired boy. Baekhyun managed to see through him by his songs. That’s something special about him that nobody else can do.

 

He wants Baekhyun to know him and he wanted to do the same.

 

“I’ll try my best not to be an ass. Let me know more of you.”

 

 

The smaller can’t find his voice – _is it really happening?_ Chanyeol’s asking him a question he had always thought of. Someone he likes – in this case, loves – is asking if he wants to date.

 

“Silence can either mean a yes or a no.” Chanyeol chuckled and leaned down to link their foreheads together. Too close yet it felt so right though Baekhyun can feel his heart beating loudly inside his chest. “I’m hoping you’re inclining to the positive meaning of silence.”

 

 

Is love and understanding enough to make it work? To make their starting relationship work? Baekhyun want it to work and not end up badly. Courage is what he needs for himself. Faith is what he should give to the expecting man beside him.

 

When Baekhyun nods, Chanyeol broke into a big smile. “Yes?”

 

“Yes.” Baekhyun looks at him. “Stop… smiling like you’ve won a million won, Chanyeol.”

 

“Believe me, you’re more than just a million won.” When they broke apart, face equally flushed, Chanyeol scooted incredibly close to Baekhyun and search his pockets, producing his phone. Baekhyun got curious as to what the taller was doing on his own phone so he peeked but then his phone suddenly rang.

Quickly, Baekhyun checked his phone – it must be his brother worrying about him but to his surprise, it was an unknown number. The raven haired panicked but nevertheless answered it.

 

“Hello?”

 

“Sehun gave the right number, then.”

 

Baekhyun turned to Chanyeol who had his phone on his ear, giving that Cheshire cat smile. The phone call ends, their phones got set aside once again. “I’ve been wanting to call you and hear your voice for the whole week but I’m sort of doubtful that Sehun gave me some wrong number. You just don’t trust that brat since he plays lots of pranks on a gullible person like me but - we’d call each other now, right? Or message? Whatever you’re comfortable with. As long as we keep in touch – we need to keep in touch.”

 

“We’re… really dating…” Baekhyun mumbles breathlessly, looking at Chanyeol’s call registered on his phone. “Chanyeol… Please pinch me. I need proofs that I’m awake and I’m not in dreamland -”

 

Chanyeol was surprised when he heard the shorter mumbled, still dazed to his phone. He cant believe he’s going to date someone like Baekhyun too but the warm water with honey made him grasp what’s happening. Without further hesitations, Chanyeol reached to cup the latter’s cheek and made Baekhyun looked at him.

 

 “Shanyeor – “

 

Instead of letting Baekhyun go, Chanyeol brilliantly thought of pinching the raven haired’s soft squishy cheeks and stretching it to both sides. It was cute because Baekhyun frowned at him and held his arms to stop him.

 

“Chanyeol. My cheeks will go saggy…”

 

Upon taking a fancy time to look at Baekhyun, Chanyeol noticed that Baekhyun’s lips looked soft, and there’s something pulling him to move closer, to put his own lips onto the thinner one presented on him. _Was it the mole on his upper lip? Was it his baby toothpaste breath?_ Whatever reason it was, the force was so strong, it numbs chanyeol’s brain from thinking anything but _kissing_ Baekhyun.

 

 

The smaller’s breathing hitched when he found Chanyeol’s eyes pinned on the lower part of his face – _was his chin that attractive?_ His body was frozen when he remembered that movie his brother watched with him before. It was after a misunderstanding being cleared up that the main actors share a kiss.

A kiss! Chanyeol was inching closely for a kiss and Baekhyun panicked – he never kissed anyone and he felt scared he might do it wrongly with Chanyeol. Pushing Chanyeol away would make him regret it – that’s for sure and the only resort Baekhyun has was to close his eyes and wait until the taller’s mouth falls onto his.

 


End file.
